I am overweight.

This is 100% my fault.

It’s not my parents’ fault, my genetics’ fault, McDonald’s fault, or Monsanto’s fault. It’s also not because I’m over 40.

It’s because I occasionally choose to eat more calories than I burn. That’s why. It’s my fault. Everything in my life is my fault.

Most American women gain weight over time. It’s just what American women do. Not all of them, but most of them.

While I don’t believe it objectively, I follow a concept called Natural Law. This means, among other things, you own your own body 100%. That means if you choose to get fat, that’s fine. That’s your choice. It’s your body, not mine, not society’s, and not the government’s. If you want to eat noodles and burritos and ice-cream and gain 40 pounds, that’s completely your choice and I support your right to do it. It’s your body. Cool with me.

(And before you say it, no,  I’m not going to get into the public healthcare debate today. “I have to control what you eat and care about your weight because I might have to pay for your healthcare!!!” Well, you shouldn’t have to pay for people’s healthcare. Under that system, healthcare becomes more expensive for no reason. But as I said, that’s a debate for another time, so please to don’t make any comments about the politics of this. That’s what my other blog is for.)

Here’s something else. Despite what I’ve said about women over 33 making men wait too long for sex in a dating environment (which is empirically correct by the way), I love women over 30 and over 40. Some of these women aren’t super skinny. Perfectly fine with me. I think older women can be, and often are, very beautiful and sexually attractive. I am not one of those manosphere guys who say as soon as a woman turns 30 she’s suddenly gross and no one wants her. I don’t agree with that at all, and never have.

However Darling, you need to be honest about WHY you’re getting fatter.

Whenever men correctly complain that American women are getting too fat, women get very upset, and respond with comments like these:

“Fuck you! I’ve had two children! Some of that weight doesn’t come off once you have babies! I’d like to see YOU have a bunch of babies come out of YOUR body and then stay skinny!!!”

“Excuse me Mr. Asshole, but hello, people gain weight as they get older. You can’t expect women to stay skinny in their late 40s and 50s!”

Let’s examine these two irrational, almost psychotic attempts made by women avoiding self-responsibility.

Babies Fault?

Just because you have a few babies does not mean you are forever forced to be overweight the rest of your life. I grant you that it does sometimes mean that you may have a little more flab on your lower stomach. It does sometimes mean that you have some stretch marks there too.

But it does not mean that now you’re suddenly 30 pounds heavier and are stuck with that extra 30 pounds forever just because you had a few babies.

If you are indeed 30 pounds heavier since you’ve had some babies, and are using that to explain your weight gain, then I’m sorry Darling, but you’re full of shit. You’re 30 pounds heavier because you’re eating more and exercising less. Blame your pregnancies all you want, but we all know you’re lying.

I’ll say it again just to be really clear: If you blame your stretch marks or slight increase in flab on your lower stomach from your pregnancies, then I agree with you and I’m not going to hold that against you. I can’t speak for other men, but I have never rejected a woman who was hot and trim because she had a little extra flab or stretch marks on her lower stomach. As long as she’s hot, and she’s more or less as skinny as she was before the babies, I’m very accepting of a few flaws.

I don’t expect women to be perfect. Plus, I never get monogamous, so even if you become my girlfriend (an OLTR) I’ll still be able to get some perfect-bodied women on the side when I need to. So unlike those men seeking monogamy, I don’t require you to be perfect. Isn’t that nice? (And yes Darling, you can get some perfect-bodied men on the side if you need to also; I’m not threatened by other men and fair is fair.)

But if you have a baby or two and gain 20, 30 pounds or more, and don’t lose it, then I’m sorry, but you’ve CHOSEN to do this. You’re just stuffing your face with more food, and using your pregnancies as a convenient scapegoat. And we all know you’re doing this. You’re not fooling anyone.

So any time you hear a woman blaming her noticeable weight gain on the fact she had babies a few years ago, remind her that she’s lying. Because she is.

Aging’s Fault?

Now let’s deal with the getting older thing. Women will often scream that you can’t blame them for getting fatter as they get older. “Everyone” gets fatter as they get older, these women say (or imply).

Many other women will imply that by complaining women get fatter, you are blaming “older women” in general. They will imply or say that you “hate” older women. Because again, to these women, old = fat.

This goes to the statement I’ve said many times:

Aging is inevitable, but fat is a choice.

I have had sex with women over 40 and even over 50(!). These women were pretty, but had plenty of signs of age, like a few wrinkles and whatnot. I have never, ever, turned down a woman because she had some signs of age…as long as she was still decently pretty and wasn’t fat.

Aging is one of those few things in life which is out of your direct control. Sure, you can age well or age badly, and that’s up to you, but your numerical age isn’t something you can control, and as you age you will have some signs of aging no matter how well you do. As a 43 year-old man, I relate to this personally.

So I will never blame a non-fat “older” woman for being older. That’s perfectly fine.

But if she’s older and clearly overweight? Well, that’s a different story. Aging is outside of her control, but her weight is directly within her control. If she’s fat, that’s her choice. And I can choose to avoid having sex with her for that reason. (Not her age!)

If you’re a woman who was skinny in her 20s and is now overweight in your 30s or 40s, you made that choice. You choose to gain that weight and not lose it. If you wanted to lose it, you could, just like this woman here.

I know TONS of American women who were skinny when they were 20, but turned fat by the time they were 26, with no kids. Can a 26-year-old woman be categorized as an “older woman?” Really? Or did these women simply make a choice?

I know TONS of women, not just one or two, but TONS, who are well over 30 and over 40, who’ve had kids, and who are still skinny. How do you explain this if babies = fat and older = fat?

If you fly to certain countries in South America, you will notice that most of the over-30 and over-40 women are still skinny. This is even accounting for the fact that Hispanic women have more body fat than white women (!). How do you explain this if older = fat?

Yet I know TONS of American women who were skinny when they were in their 20s, and are now over 30 or over 40 and are clearly overweight. Because they’re choosing to eat more crap.

And again, that’s fine. It’s your body. Eat that pizza and get as fat as you like. But don’t lie to me about how it’s because “you’ve had kids” or because “you’re older.” Those aren’t the reasons, Darling. And you know it.

Aging is inevitable, but fat is a choice.

67 Comments on “Aging is Inevitable, Fat is a Choice

  1. Things white women invented;

    -glass ceiling

    -pay gap

    -rape culture

    -1 baby=30-50 lb. bodyfat indulgence voucher.

    -Kevlar

    Things white men invented;

    Pretty much everything in the world except for paper (Chinese).

  2. Thanks, BD.  I love your ongoing theme of personal responsibility, and that everything is 100% my fault.  That is, if I am able to make choices in my life to either better myself and live happily or live in misery, then it’s my own fault to which end result I choose to live by.

    Things that people don’t have control over (e.g., age, other people, etc.) and can’t physically or mentally overcome (i.e., physical limitations) should be cast aside as the facts (or cruelty) of life.  Not everyone is created equally (either biologically or environmentally), but one can do the best one can to live the best life one can have by taking personal responsibility and making the right choices.

  3. I agree with you in principle that women use this as an excuse, but weight loss really isn’t as simple as eat less and exercise more either.

    My mother was a fucking martial arts and aerobics instructor who exercised and sweated her ass off for a living.  I don’t think I’ve ever met a more obsessive or more knowledgeable fitness nazi than she was, and she was always fat.  I think rock bottom for her was around 160, and that was when she was around 30 and working out in the dojo seven days a week.  She struggled to hover at around 200 most of her life, in spite of eating better and getting more exercise than the vast teeming majority of lazy fat ass Americans.

    I really think maybe it actually is something in the food supply.  I know a guy who took his wife back home to Russia after she gained a bunch of weight over here, cooking the same recipes with the same ingredients she cooked back home.  When they got back to Russia, she dropped the weight pretty quick.

  4. Ok. I’m done preaching. I gotta go roll another blunt, then sink into my oversized LazyBoy with a pint of Haagen Dazs, watch back-to-back episodes of Sons of Anarchy, while waiting for my lottery winnings to accrue more interest.

  5. @ Troubador- It really is that simple. I’ve fluctuated between 180 and 150 pounds for a couple years now, and every time I lose weight it’s because I reduce the number of calories I eat, and every time I gain weight it’s because I don’t watch what I eat. Your mom must have eaten more than she burned, which isn’t really that hard if you eat a bunch of snacks (one Snickers bar could undo an entire workout).

    I recommend watching a show called Secret Eaters, it’s on Youtube. Everybody on the show says exactly what you said. “I don’t eat that much, I don’t know why I’m gaining weight. It must be a thyroid or low metabolism or something.” Then when the show stalks them it turns out they’re just eating a lot.

  6. Im with Troubadour. While I agree that you are 100% responsible for your actions (what goes in your mouth), Im also 100% convinced there is something in the American food supply. The only way you can really control your weight is to eat no processed foods at all. Living in Portland you also have a great base of healthy choices to eat from, both eating out and farms to get great foods from. That isn’t the case in a lot of the country. 

    I have a close friend that is like BD. He walks by a donut and gains 5 lbs, I don’t even understand it. The only thing that has got great results is imtermittant fasting. So there is a great chance that it’s not just what you eat but how you eat. I think the above example of his mother shows this. The societal programming for how we eat is just as messed up as dating/love. You have to really really want to understand it, spend a lot of time learning and experimenting with it, and the have the drive to continue. Not to mention somehow get around the poison that is food today. This is simply a lot of work that some people wont put in.

     

  7. @tony Yes that is some people but I know for a fact this isn’t the case with my friend. Not everyone is a depraved secret eater. The body is complex and some people can eat very little and still have issues. Clearly this can’t account for everyone. Also, kinda messed up to imply about someones mother. Im 100% convinced its not as easy as calories in and calories out.

  8. @Diggy- In order for that to be the case, these people would have to defy the laws of thermodynamics. Your body needs a certain amount of energy to perform the functions that keep you alive. You get that energy from the food you eat. If you eat more than you burn, your body converts the excess into fat. If you eat less than you burn, your body uses the extra stores from fat to make up the difference.

    If what you say is true, then this person somehow has a super mutation that makes their body to run far more efficiently than a typical person. If that was the case, they could then just eat less and still be fine. In fact they’d be lucky, since it’d save them a lot of money on food if they only needed 1,000 calories or so to live.

    You seem to think that to get fat you have to constantly shovel food in your mouth, but in reality it’s not hard to gain a lot of weight over time. If a person drank a bottle of Coke a day, but otherwise ate at maintenance, they would gain 19 pounds in a year. If they weighed 150 pounds at 18, they would weigh 378 pounds by the time they turned 30. Just from drinking one bottle of coke a day!

  9. It’s not as simple as calories in and calories out + exercise. Avoiding sugar is a huge issue, especially since it is hidden in just about everything, except the air. (For now.) Then you have macros to think about, as well as intermittent fasting. And of course, getting enough sleep.

    But still – this is all stuff you should be doing anyway.

  10. @tony   I won’t argue a single point you made.  Yes, calories is the number one factor with MOST people. Obviously, if you eat a ton of calories you’re going to put on weight regardless of genetic makeup or source of food. The same is to be said for the opposite.

     

    What I’m saying is there is also a factor of source. I would argue that there are a lot of malnourished fat people in America. So, how your meat bag is functioning is vitally important. Or at least that’s been my experience and a few of my peers. I’m also pointing out there there is something, I dont know what, in the America diet that is beyond just calories. It might be our timing (ie IF) or low nutrient density foods. I honestly think there is something worse than that. I had a similar experience an above commentator mentioned when I went to Poland. I ate a ton of pierogies fried in bacon fat and other breaded goods and lost weight and my digestive tract felt better. I was also walking a lot every day but overall I’m convinced there is something way more than just cals in and cals out. I’ve known a few people that could just about starve themselves and workout and still not have my frame. Shitty luck…. but overall there is something much much more that cals in vs cals out for a lot of Americans.

     

  11. @Diggy- The problem with that idea is, as I said, it only works if you ignore the laws of physics. Energy is conserved, which means it can’t be created or destroyed. A calorie is a unit of energy (actually, the calories we use to measure food are more properly called Calories with a capital “C”, or kilocalories, which is 1,000 calories with a lower case “c”). A Calorie is the amount of energy needed to raise the temperature of a kilogram of water one degree Celsius. When you eat a certain number of Calories, your body goes through a process to turn the energy from the form in food to the form it can use (I forget the details, it’s been a while since I’ve studied biology). As I said, if there is more energy in the food than your body needs, it converts it again into a form that can be stored, and this storage is called fat. Fat is like a battery, it simply stores energy for future use. When you eat less energy than your body needs, it draws on the energy reserves in your fat, converting it back into the kind of energy muscles and organs can use.

    When people say “Calories in, Calories out” what they’re really saying is “Energy in, energy out”. The one and only way to lose weight is to force your body to draw on it’s energy reserves in fat, and to do this you have to eat less energy than you use. It’s that simple.

  12. ” it only works if you ignore the laws of physics”  Not at all.
    “It’s that simple.” I disagree whole heartedly.
    I have an aerospace degree, I assure you I understand physics. I also spent close to ten years working in the gym and health world. I understand exactly what you are saying. Again, don’t disagree but you have a narrow focus. 

    It is completely plausible that the conservation of energy exists and there be many variable that alter that rate. For instance, maybe the low nutritional value of mono-cropped foods alters the way the body functions? Which is highly cited. Maybe it’s a chemical that got snuck in like pesticides? Its perfectly plausible that pesticides (or GMOs for that matter) in foods could change the way the metabolism functions. IE, changing the rate of burning or conserving energy.  Just ask the bees!

    It’s very possible that both what you are saying and what I am saying are working against us. The only real way around it is to spend a massive amount of effort to buy your way out of the food paradigm that exists in America. Which is why in the next year I’ll be out of the city, on more land, and growing my own foods via convention and aquaponics gardening. I’m that convinced that there is something going on with the foods more than just eating too much. The better and cleaner I eat the better and clearer I fell!

  13. You say you understand, and you say you don’t disagree, but then you don’t address the core issue. Let me simplify this by just asking one simple question.

    Where is the extra energy coming from?

    People need X amount of energy to run their bodies. I contend that if a person eats Y amount of energy, where Y<X, they will get X-Y energy from their fat stores. You disagree, but you do agree that energy is conserved, so this X-Y amount of energy has to come from somewhere. So where is it coming from?

  14. I agree with both sides, but that doesn’t change the bottom line.

    The very first time I went to Asia I was shocked at how skinny people were while eating piles of shitty food. In China they’re all skinny, yet they constantly stuff their faces with noodles, rice, dumplings, and other high glycemic carbs. (Yes, they eat lots of vegetables also, but that doesn’t offset the sheer amount of garbage they eat.) Yet they’re still skinny! WTF?

    So I agree it’s very possible there’s something strange going on with the American food supply. I think that’s quite plausible. One of my ex-MLTRs is a prominent anti-GMO activist, and she’s shown me some compelling stuff.

    BUT! That doesn’t change a single thing I said, and you cannot use this as an excuse. That’s why I specifically said in the post, “It’s not Monsanto’s fault.”

    Yes, there might be something wrong with our food. Stipulated. But you can’t go around saying “I’m 35 pounds overweight because of GMOs.” No, you’re 35 pounds overweight because you eat too many calories.

  15. Thank you for pointing out that eating more “crap” is what causes weight gain. A woman can eat well: quality, whole, clean foods and not be the stereotypical salad-only at dinner type. I’m 30 (uh oh, less than 3 years until I’m Kay-ray 😉 ), and have had two children. I lost the pregnancy weight both times through moderate exercise and a very good eating plan. I’m thinner now than I was at my pre-pregnancy weight because I cleaned up diet.

    Fair or not, you cannot out train a poor diet, it isn’t as simple as calories in and calories out, especially for women. It’s about eating real food! I’ll step off the soapbox before I get into the politics of the food industry, etc.

    Finally, thanks for being realistic about stretch marks and the small amount of flab post-pregnancy, it’s refreshing to see that point of view.

  16. American food is stuffed with cheap artificial sugar. I am European and I was astonished how many sweet shit and sugar can Americans happily eat and drink. That and  white grain products.

  17. but then you don’t address the core issue. Where is the extra energy coming from?

    I did address the issue. I said that your point is true but there is something deeper than just that one fact or angle. There is no extra energy… just changing rates of storage and burning. Like RMR, lots of things can effect this. Age, hormones, amount of muscle vs fat, maybe even something is the food.  If chemicals or molecules can’t effect this then what is the point of the dozens of supplements that do help people lose weight? Herbs have zero calories, correct? Yet, there is empirical evidence some do actually work.

    No, you’re 35 pounds overweight because you eat too many calories.

    Agreed. I would just say it, “no, you’re 35 pounds over weight because you eat too much garbage”  Speaking of Asia, has anyone seen gutter oil? Google this if you want to see a new low for humanity…literally shitty foods.

  18. There is no extra energy… just changing rates of storage and burning.

    So you do agree, if you’re not losing weight, you need to eat less. In other words, calories in versus calories out.

    Can certain things effect how much you burn? Sure, but in general they’ll go the other way (i.e. they’ll make you burn more) for the simple reason that we evolved in an environment where food energy was scarce, so there were heavy evolutionary pressures to make our bodies run as efficiently as possible. If something messes up that system, it’s far more likely to make it run less efficiently, in other words you burn more energy and lose weight easier. You mention supplements, but notice how the ones that help you gain weight are just really calorie dense, because slowing down your metabolism is extremely difficult.

    The only things that would cause you to get fatter aren’t things that effect the energy in, energy out equation. They effect your hormones in a way that increase your appetite, so you end up eating more.

    You’re looking at it backwards, at least in my opinion. Energy in, energy out is the driving factor of weight loss and weight gain, and anything that affects weight ultimately works within that framework. No matter what other environmental factors you want to think about, the statement “If you eat less energy than you burn you will lose weight” will be true. If something causes you to only burn 1,000 calories a day, then eat 900 to lose weight. If something causes your appetite to increase, either ignore it or stuff yourself with low calorie or zero calorie food.

  19. if you’re not losing weight, you need to eat less. In other words, calories in versus calories out.

    Absolutely. But this might be more difficult for some than for others:

    There is no extra energy… just changing rates of storage and burning.

    At least two of my former colleagues could easily eat twice what I was eating, and easily hold their weight while I was struggling.  Another one actually HAD to eat at least 7 meals a day just to hold his weight (and no, he did not think that lucky).

    On the other hand, I spend the last weekend, 3 days, with a female dancing partner of mine (who is considerably overweight), both putting in a decent 8-10 hours of sport, while both eating approx. the same (me having milk and sugar with my coffee instead of drinking it black, and drinking coke rather than water, so probably I put in slightly more calories) – but despite the fact that I was eating more and we were both doing the exact same movements, she gained weight while I lost weight.

    On the other hand, another dancing partner of mine (very thin, nearly frail) is almost constantly eating…

    So, yes, physic tells us that without sufficient calorific intake I can not gain fat – but experience tells me that all other things being equal what constitutes sufficient calorific intake will vary wildly from person to person.

    Which doesn’t change the fact that it’s still their own fault…

  20. Wondering if you BD or anyone else has played with intermittent fasting? Good way to not have to radically change what you eat, but just cut down eating windows. I have started doing it until noon everyday, and today have made it to 5pm almost there…

  21. I generally agree that people get fat because they want to or they choose to not take care of themselves.  My ex gf was a prime example of that.  She used to have a hot thin body, then when she moved out on her own she bloated.  She chose that route.

     

    My current GF however, doesn’t really have a choice so to speak.  She is over weight, that is true, but she can’t lose it due to medication.  She works out like crazy, and watches what she eats, but something about her medication, I can’t remember the specifics, really slows down her metabolism.  She isn’t choosing to be over weight, her medication prevents her from losing it.  She is working hard to lose it, so that when she comes off it in a couple months, the exercise routine will be in place, so when her metabolism gets back to normal, then the weight should come right off.  She even hired a personal trainer.  In this case, she isn’t choosing to keep the weight, she has no choice.  Either take meds to save her life and be overweight for a year, or not take them, look hot, and risk a life threatening infection.  I agree with her to decision to take the meds.

  22. you cannot out train a poor diet, it isn’t as simple as calories in and calories out

    I’m the poster boy for that one. I love exercising, exercise 7 days a week + 2 more times lifting weights + tons of sex, and my fat still won’t come off without a huge, huge battle. I have to be 100% perfect with my eating literally 24/7 or I’m screwed. It’s very difficult.

    thanks for being realistic about stretch marks and the small amount of flab post-pregnancy, it’s refreshing to see that point of view.

    My deal is this: You can’t see it when their clothes are on, and more importantly, where are your eyes actually pointing when you have sex with a woman? Her lower stomach? Nope, it’s nowhere near there. They’re usually pointing at her face and chest, or her ass during doggy style. Even when going down on her you’re not looking at her lower stomach or can’t see it.

    I have been with many super hot, super young, super fit women who had a baby, and had 100% prefect, tight bodies except for a little tiny flab on the lower stomach. It didn’t detract from the experience for me at all. Never has.

    I suppose if you took a woman like that, made her naked, and walked her into the bathroom under full lights and bent over and stared at that area of her stomach from two inches away, then okay, that might be a little off-putting…but who the fuck does that?

    Wondering if you BD or anyone else has played with intermittent fasting? 

    Yep. I do it now and have done it for about 6 months. It hasn’t helped.

    I’m going to continue to do it anyway because it’s very helpful for time management. (Eating 6 times a day, even 5-4 times a day, is fucking insane, and no one outside of pro athletes are going to follow a schedule like that for 25 years straight.)

    She is over weight, that is true, but she can’t lose it due to medication.

    Yeah medication is a whole different problem. I agree that’s a tough one.

  23. As an older, slim man (that’s slim as in slim, not the dating site slim) I can tell you there is nothing nicer than a horny, slim, 45+ year old woman. At that age, if she is slim, you know she’s taking care of herself!

    My diet rule is “eat when you are hungry”. If you think you are hungry, have a glass of water. If you are still hungry, then eat something. Never follow the three meals a day advice. It’s crap.

    Joke: Did you know that most American women pray before they eat? Can you imagine praying 18 times a day?

  24. BD,

    Do you drink?  As I get older, I find alcohol to be an extremely tricky carbohydrate. It’s almost like it can exist in its own realm of fat synthesis, outside of exercise and diet (which may be ideal).

    My theory is that (especially if you have the one-drink-a-day ritual at roughly the same time each evening) your body expects the alcohol and knows it’s coming and is all geared up to convert it into fat–more and more efficiently the longer you maintain that pattern. If you workout and lift a lot, you probably aren’t getting ENOUGH calories over the years. Your muscle is broken, so you really should be eating a ton of protein to recover. But you’re overweight so you watch what you eat, right? Yet there you are with broken down muscle tissue, so you are perpetually catabolic and have a low metabolism with your hormones all set to grab any extra calories and convert them into fat whenever they get the chance. Then funky alcohol carbs come along and are immediately synthesized into fat, despite your otherwise careful diet.

    It’s just my theory. No medical backup. But I think a lot of guys (me) who have gotten used to more or less constant lifting, lose sight of how much they’re really supposed to be eating. It seems like they would be ripped in that case though, right? Because they’re burning up more than they’re eating but it’s not so simple when the activity is heavy lifting (as opposed to routine exercise). They have broken down muscle, more or less constantly for years, and that leads to ever lowering metabolism because their body is doing what it must to somehow repair that muscle despite modest protein intake (for a lifter).  Get it? I read recently that the diets of the Rock, Fournier, that Kabuki Warrior guy would make a normal bodybuilding bro go into a puking session by 3 pm because it’s just so much food. I think the Rock’s diet caused that in an already dedicated lifter/builder. Anyway, if you’re catabolic with low metabolism then your hormones are set up for extremely efficient fat storage. Then the alcohol in your system is a sitting duck for that configuration.

  25. Many of the posters on here are bringing up good points about the complexities of human metabolism and the horrors of the western diet but there is still a lot of confusion between ‘simple’ and ‘easy’.

    It IS as simple as calories in, calories out — at least in the big picture BUT because of all the complex factors that can confound your efforts to lose fat it is far from ‘easy’. Not easy to understand, not easy to actually get it done. A whole list of factors which can influence how your body processes food and metabolizes energy would fill a few pages, as would a list of how fucked up processed foods are but it still all comes down to energy in vs. energy out.

    A bigger problem is how skewed our society’s perception of ‘hard’ and ‘easy’ has become. The vast majority of people in the western world have no concept of what it takes to accomplish something difficult because they have never been sufficiently challenged in their lives to actually know what ‘difficult’ is. These people view as ‘impossible’ that which is merely difficult. In general our mental perception of where our physical limits are is hugely underestimated and sadly most people have never and will never find out what they are actually capable of.

     

     

     

  26. My diet rule is “eat when you are hungry”. 

    The problem is what you eat when you’re hungry. It gets really fucking boring eating a salad every time you’re hungry. 🙂 I’ve noticed there are people who like eating vegetables and like eating stuff like salads. I am not one of these people. I eat these things because I have to, not because I like it.

    BD, Do you drink?

    No. Never been drunk in my entire life. I take a few sips of wine one social occasions but never even get buzzed.

  27. Ok, I will be the skinny jerk here, since I’ve never weighed more than 5 lbs above my high school weight, and for the past several years I’ve actually weighed less.

    Here’s the thing: there is definitely a metabolic syndrome problem that happens to people after decades of eating a high carb/high sugar diet. Some people can eat much more than others before they get fat. BUT virtually everyone could be thin if they would just allow themselves to get hungry.

    In the US, people act like it’s some terrible, unspeakable thing to be hungry for a few hours or, god forbid, a whole day. They don’t let their kids get hungry for more than 2 minutes before they’re shoveling snacks at them. But in a state of nature, being hungry is a perfectly natural, normal, harmless state. And if you want to stay thin into your 40s, 50s, and beyond, you just gotta accept that you’re going to be hungry a lot and THAT’S OK.

    No one is going to starve to death. Unless you literally have no body fat

  28. The fact that people (and even pets) who are carrying pounds and pounds of excess fat that their body could burn will perceive themselves to be starving, and act as if they’re starving, shows that your body is giving you false signals with little relation to reality. There are lots of people so fat they could go a few months without eating and still be alive. So when your body is telling you that you’re starving and need to eat right now or you’ll die, it’s lying to you.

    Thin adults generally get used to being hungry at least a few hours a day. And uncomfortable with being too full. Most people get used to the opposite, and feel like something’s wrong if their stomach is empty. I used to be like that but now I don’t eat til at least 1 pm and sometimes not til 4 or 5 (though I do eat way more than most people at night). Either way, it’s a habit, which means it’s very hard to change but once you’ve made the change it’s not that hard to maintain.

    Another tip is to eat as much fat as possible…since I started a high fat diet (purposely eating as much fat as possible) my body got used to burning fat as fuel and it became pretty effortless. Hot tip from me to you.

  29. It can be summed up with calories in, calories out. The problem is most arent tracking their calories meticulously. It takes a lot of work to do that and pretty much means no eating out. A can of pop has like 130, two cookies is 130, a burger 300-800. Exercise (calories out) is relative to each person also. Hitting only cardio for 1hr burns less calories than 45mins of intense weight training. Walking is ‘exercise’, but the amount of calorie burnt isnt a lot.

    Another problem is the definition of ‘fat’. I recently gained weight, but I wouldnt call myself ‘fat’. I added 5lbs of muscle. Weight is not fat. Most people keep forgetting this. Body builders can be 250+, but they wouldnt be considered ‘fat’.

    I agree that being fat is a choice (like that pregnancy choice). But due to genetics, the effort required to be not fat can range from easy to difficult.

    Yes, there are exceptions, but it seems like exceptions are the norm (from reading internet comments, not only this blog)….which doesnt make sense.

  30. Ok, I will be the skinny jerk here, since I’ve never weighed more than 5 lbs above my high school weight, and for the past several years I’ve actually weighed less.

    I’d be majorly depressed if I was only five pounds over my high school weight. I had 6% body fat at 5′ 8″ and 130 lbs back then, and it’s true what they say, “Abs on a skinny guy are like boobs on a fat chick; nobody cares.” 😀

  31. Hi Kate:

    So when your body is telling you that you’re starving and need to eat right now or you’ll die, it’s lying to you.

     

    Another tip is to eat as much fat as possible…since I started a high fat diet (purposely eating as much fat as possible) my body got used to burning fat as fuel and it became pretty effortless. Hot tip from me to you.

    These two comments are so true. When we dehydrate, hunger and thirst signals become confused. So when we “fancy a snack” – we are probably needing water but we don’t feel thirsty, so we eat.

    A lack of fat in diet can cause the liver to get lazy and stop doing it’s job.

  32. @Kryptokate –

    Thank you for commenting on the fat problem with foods! I am convinced that one of the reasons Americans are so fat is because of the fat-free craze (all while adding in tons of sugar and artificial junk to make it taste palatable). It is very frustrating to look for yogurt and see shelves upon shelves of fat-free yogurt and only a couple of full-fat options (usually in the large size, which I can never finish). I’ve bought the fat-free a few times by mistake, and it tasted so disgustingly sweet – one from Trader Joe’s had 35 grams of sugar per serving! And this is coming from someone who has a pretty big sweet tooth and loves carbs!

    And I agree that having kids and getting older is not a given that you will get fat. I hear this a lot, but my cousin had 2 kids and is still a size 2, my mom had me and is 65 years old and a size 2, and one of the executives at work had 5(!) kids and is thin and EXTREMELY attractive. Seriously, I was stunned to learn she was in her 50s – she looks no older than 35!

    I think more likely what’s going on is that a lot of the women who gain a lot of weight simply stopped caring about their appearance in general -I notice many of these same women dress frumpy, wear no makeup and never style their hair. Or maybe those things are a side effect of gaining weight and no longer feeling attractive – who knows. There’s also a focus in the U.S. on treatment after the fact rather than prevention (with regard to things like skin care and diet/exercise), and by the time excess weight and wrinkles set in, it is more difficult to reverse than if the person had just picked up good habits when they were young and stuck with them. Just look at all the “miracle” celebrity diets and wrinkle creams advertised!

    That said, I do think that an extra 10-20 pounds can look fabulous on an otherwise fit woman, as the extra fat tends to go to the right places because the stomach, legs and arms remain toned, while chest and glute exercises make the boobs and butt perky. 🙂

  33. @ BD

    I have a cunning plan 🙂

    Maybe you will see this in your lifetime. Women who sign up for internet dating should be required to have a set of weighing scales that plug in to their computer via USB. If they fail the weight test, they can’t sign up.

    This would achieve two things. One, they would have incentive to lose weight. Two, it would stop them contacting people who have absolutely no interest in them.

    Maybe you could patent this idea and make your fortune. 🙂 🙂

  34. @John Smith –

    I agree; weight doesn’t tell the whole story. When I started getting into fitness last year, my trainer told me not to be surprised if I lost no weight or even gained a couple of pounds – in fact, I shouldn’t even be focused on the scale at all, but rather the percent body fat and how I look. He said people who are very overweight to begin with can expect to see a large drop in weight as a result of getting into shape, but for people who are average to trim it’s about converting fat to muscle, which of course weighs more. He was right – I haven’t lost any weight, but I look much better and my metabolism has gone way up as a result of gaining more muscle mass. 🙂

  35. Some random comments:

    If you want to stay slim & healthy, prepare your own food from scratch almost exclusively. So much salt & sugar is added to foods & drinks, making you retain water, which looks like fat on you. Also of course salt & sugar make you crave more crap food/drinks which keep you fat. Your taste buds will adjust to the lack of being bombarded with salt & sugar. Then you can taste more flavor, more subtlety, more complexity. Then simple food (which previously you would’ve rejected as being too bland) satisfies your taste buds like it didn’t before. Example: rolled oats & diced banana & coconut oil (liquefied) & walnut bits: no need for sugar or honey or milk or cooking. Instant tasty healthy granola.

    Avoid fat-free protein. It doesn’t get absorbed as well as protein + fat. Your body is designed to digest protein with fat. Fat-free protein is not found in nature for a reason. At the very least, you can simply add a teaspoon of canola oil to a fat-free protein to mitigate the problem.

    The Atkins Diet and the Paleo Diet seem rather similar to me. I love bread (and other starchy carbohydrates), but I must admit both of those diets have a lot of good reasons supporting them. [I don’t advocate either one 100%. I’ve been studying & experimenting with diet (and exercise) for decades.]

    Jack LaLanne was advocating a Paleo type diet decades before Atkins or Paleo diets ‘arrived’. JLL said “If man made it, don’t eat it.”  JLL was great in many ways. He deserves way more credit than he gets now.

    Drinking enough water can be much easier if you find some water that actually tastes good to you — so try some different sources. I like ‘reverse osmosis’ filtered water best. It’s worth a little time & trouble to maintain a supply of some water you will drink enough.

    You can teach yourself to *enjoy* feeling hungry (‘Ah, light & clear; lean & sharp’ etc.). Funny how you can skip dinner and then you don’t stay hungry (until you eat again). Don’t assume you’ll stay hungry until you eat again. Hunger can just go away sometimes. If you simply wish to banish hunger w/minimal eating, drinking water may do it, or eating one boiled egg.

  36. Blackdragon, I will be the first person to tell you that you are the most stupendous intellect when it comes to scrutinizing the ubiquitous delusion of long term monogamy and marriage. Your blog as well as your books are personally eye opening, and very thought provoking. However, it’s quite unfortunate to see that you believe that fat accumulation is the result of (thermodynamics, calories in vs calories out) physics and not (hormonal regulation, particularly insulin) physiology. I’m not trying to convey any insinuation here, but it’s alright to exclude preconceived notions regarding the energy in–energy out hypothesis when your level of expertise on the matter is at a rudimentary level. Personally, I would not discuss quantum mechanics with anyone do to my ignorance concerning physics. I believe one shouldn’t speak about a topic they know very little about since fallacies and myths will inevitably be postulated. Thanks again for the awesome blog!

  37. Maybe you will see this in your lifetime. Women who sign up for internet dating should be required to have a set of weighing scales that plug in to their computer via USB. If they fail the weight test, they can’t sign up.

    It will probably never happen, since very few women would sign up for such a site. But we can certainly add it to our list of features for our ideal dating site.

    it’s quite unfortunate to see that you believe that fat accumulation is the result of (thermodynamics, calories in vs calories out) physics and not (hormonal regulation, particularly insulin) physiology.

    That isn’t what I said. Go re-read my comment above. I think it is about calories, but I also think there are other factors at play as well. You should be aware of your own extreme black-and-white thinking.

  38. @ Amanda Definitely agree it’s annoying trying to find full fat foods with all the low-fat crap out there…especially yogurt! Full fat Faje yogurt is my go-to lunch and it’s always hard to find. And it absolutely was when the low fat craze happened and they started making low fat foods with sugar substituted to make up for the bad taste that people started getting really fat. I tell people that I’m on a high fat diet and they think it’s a joke or not true…people can’t get their heads around the fact that fat isn’t bad for you and doesn’t want make you fat

  39. 100% agree the right mindset and approach this (and all life issues) is always to accept full responsibility, but as a guy who religiously ‘ate his macros’ with MyFitnessPal logging every calorie for 3 months (in addition to my cycle to work and 3x PT sessions per week) I am convinced it’s more complicated that ‘a calorie is a calorie’.  The recent Sugar documentary shows this – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uaWekLrilY (IMDB 7.5).

    There is also something up with the food supply, here in Australia also.  My GF is Russian, has no problem eating bread, pasta and milk products back home, but can eat only ‘gluten free’ and ‘dairy free’ foods here otherwise suffers bad stomach upset (we don’t believe it’s the gluten or dairy itself, but can’t pinpoint what it is).  Having lived in America I believe it’s even worse there.

    Forks over Knives is a great doco as well (IMDB 7.7 – http://www.forksoverknives.com/the-film/). That huge nutritional study in China is eye opening.

    I find watching these food docos once every 2 weeks or so re-focuses me on eating healthy.

  40. I’ve noticed there are people who like eating vegetables and like eating stuff like salads. I am not one of these people. I eat these things because I have to, not because I like it.

    This might be getting off-topic, but I’m wondering. Things like the above sound strange to me, and the more so the more often I hear those, because here in Eastern Europe salads are eaten all the time (subject to fresh vegetable availability) and no-one complains. To be exact, simple home-made salads, an example would be sliced tomatoes and cucumbers + maybe green onions + dill or parsley + salt + vegetable oil or sour cream. Are Americans really that averse to vegetables?

  41. Are Americans really that averse to vegetables?

    Hahaha, not at all, we love love love iceberg lettuce and tomatoes on cheese burgers! We drip our fries in ketchup all the time… is ranch a veggie?

     

    🙂  The easy answer is Yes, Americans don’t eat vegetables. For some reason its like a punishment. I have found in my life that my tastes adjust to what Im eating. Stop being a baby and just eat healthy and eventually the mind and stomach will follow.

  42. @BD

    Yep. I do it now and have done it for about 6 months. It hasn’t helped. I’m going to continue to do it anyway because it’s very helpful for time management.

    Agree. I does not work 100% for everybody.

    (Eating 6 times a day, even 5-4 times a day, is fucking insane, and no one outside of pro athletes are going to follow a schedule like that for 25 years straight.)

    This is so wrong!!! I’ve been doing this for almost 20 years and I do not plan to stop untill I die. Also I know A LOT of people who do that to. The fact is it will work only if it becomes a core part of your lifestyle and routine. There are tons of ways of doing it while not spending a lot of time preparing food, but this is a topic for another discussion. Just for the record I spend a grand total of 30-60 minutes a day cooking all my meals plus two 01 hour trips to the market every week. That’s an average of less than 8 hours a week!

    The very first time I went to Asia I was shocked at how skinny people were while eating piles of shitty food.

    So true! But if you pay attention there’s virtually NO ONE ripped there (exception made to some juiced knuckleheads). Even skinny girls have a little flab on their lower stomachs. IMHO in Asia people are skinny because they eat A LOT LESS than us, and not because of the quality of what they’re puting inside (which is terrible).

    @lazyguy

    If you want to stay slim & healthy, prepare your own food from scratch almost exclusively.

    Yep, this is a must. People need to re-learn the ways of preparing their own food and put aside industrialized crap. Cooking can also be fun.

    Avoid fat-free protein. It doesn’t get absorbed as well as protein + fat. Your body is designed to digest protein with fat.

    This one depends on the time of the day (coupled with a lot of other factors). After an intense workout it’s a consensus that high-glycemic carb+fast digesting protein is the way to go (no fats). Waxy maze is changing that a little.

    The Atkins Diet and the Paleo Diet seem rather similar to me.

    Yep. Both are shit and destroy your body. They should be used only for short periods when you’re trying to cut weight for a show/beach/swimming pool time/etc. Carb cycling is a little better once you get used to it (but it’s a lot of trouble to do it properly).

    You can teach yourself to *enjoy* feeling hungry

    Not so sure. Feeling hungry sucks and it’s really unnecessary to loose weight. Proper diet will ensure you’re eating enough even if you’re on a caloric defit, thus you’ll not feel like crap. Only exception is if you’re an over 250lbs mammoth who needs to get your weight down ASAP so you’ll not die.

    @tonystark

    It’s not as simple as calories in and calories out + exercise. Avoiding sugar is a huge issue, especially since it is hidden in just about everything, except the air.

    This is a killer. People tend to get fat free produts (which at the same time are loaded with sugar) and think they’re eating healthy. My advice is: read the labels (even if we cannot trust them 100%).

    Other things that kill your gains and make you fat:
    – beer (and all the other whole grains acoholic stuff)
    – poor sleeping
    – not eating enough good fats
    – not adjusting your diet (diet cycling is a must as your body will get used to the same food if you don’t change what you eat after a long time)
    – putting cardio above Resistance Training. Cardio sucks! (BTW crossfit also sucks). I’ve been saying this for a long time but people are too stubborn and don’t listen. Doing cardio three times a week is more than enough if you have everything else in check. And yes, a good diet, intense resistance training and NO CARDIO will make you loose weight faster than longer cardio sessions.

  43. Are Americans really that averse to vegetables?

    Yes.

    Most of us who eat them (and most of us don’t) eat them because we have to, not because we like it. Diggy is right; it’s almost like a punishment for us.

    I eat veggies daily but I don’t like it at all. It feels like doing my taxes; doing it because there’s a gun to my head, not because I want to.

    This is so wrong!!! I’ve been doing this for almost 20 years and I do not plan to stop untill I die. Also I know A LOT of people who do that to.

    I too know plenty of people who do it, but the vast majority of people do it for a while, not for 20 years straight. If you have literally eaten 6 times a day, every day, for 20 years straight, then I find that very hard to believe. But I’ll take your word for it.

    Just for the record I spend a grand total of 30-60 minutes a day cooking all my meals plus two 01 hour trips to the market every week. That’s an average of less than 8 hours a week!

    Now there’s you’re wrong. I teach time managment for a living, and I promise you that if you carry a timer around with you and track 100% of your time spent:

    – Shopping for food (including travel time)
    – Preparing the food
    – Eating the food
    – Cleaning up the kitchen, mess, dishes, etc

    …you’ll be looking at way, way more than “30-60 minutes a day” if you’re seriously eating 6 times daily with food you prepare yourself. It could easily be double that. If you don’t belive me, then time yourself doing all of those activities, with a timer, for 7 days straight, and you’ll see what I mean. I promise you’ll be shocked at how much time you’re spending on this.

    Even if you’re right, and you aren’t, and it’s “only” 60 minutes a day, every day of your life, for the rest of your life is a LOT of time. It may not seem like a lot, but it is. Add in there travel and special events, and your life is really complicated if you have to eat six times a day forever.

    Feeling hungry sucks and it’s really unnecessary to loose weight. 

    Incorrect. That only applies to certain body types.

    I promise you that with my big, low-metabolism, endomorphic body, there’s no way in hell I will get down to a healthy weight without being hungry at least a little bit. And I’m not the only one. I’ve tracked the calories and food quality and exercise here very carefully using apps like LoseIt!

    With some people, yes, you can eat a lot of high-quality stuff, exercise, lift weights, and never be hungry and lose or maintain a great weight. Not everyone though.

     

  44. That isn’t what I said. Go re-read my comment above. I think it is about calories, but I also think there are other factors at play as well. You should be aware of your own extreme black-and-white thinking.

    That is precisely what you mentioned. I find it phantasmagorically strange that you find my reasoning a logical fallacy (black-and-white, as you put it). I clearly outlined that the way a human being gains or loses fat tissue is predominately dependent on hormonal regulation, which is multifactorial and quite a conundrum, but it definitely isn’t based upon that which you vacuously wrote.

    The following three sentences have been derived from this page.

    You’re 30 pounds heavier because you’re eating more and exercising less.

    It’s because I occasionally choose to eat more calories than I burn.

    No, you’re 35 pounds overweight because you eat too many calories.

    I hear the first one all the time, and it never ceases to humor me. The parlance you used is the epitome of someone who is trying to apply the first law of thermodynamics to the physiology of body weight regulation. It’s astonishing how ubiquitous dietary dogma is and how easily it was perpetuated by mainstream nutritional ideology. The beliefs one holds concerning this topic is comparable to when a person becomes indoctrinated by their religion and continues to be incredulous to highly compelling counter arguments. In other words, it’s incredibly hard to jettison the dogma surrounding this misconception.

  45. I clearly outlined that the way a human being gains or loses fat tissue is predominately dependent on hormonal regulation

    Calories consumed and burned are a significant factor in fat loss or gain. True or false?

  46. Are Americans really that averse to vegetables?

    Yes, unfortunately. I was lucky enough to NOT have been raised in a “meat and potatoes” family – my school lunches consisted of raw carrots, turnips and broccoli stems, along with other healthy stuff. I was brought up drinking water, never soda or milk, and do to this day. However, the typical school lunch (and what was served in the cafeteria, at least when I was a kid back in the 90s) was a carton of low-fat milk, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or bologna sandwich slopped with mayonnaise (ALWAYS on white bread), some chocolate pudding or a Fruit Roll-Up, a bag of chips, and an apple or orange that normally went in the trash. No wonder so many kids are obese! Peer pressure can be a strong thing, and I admit I started eating more garbage and continued into my mid-20s. Of course, at that age my metabolism was high enough to keep me thin regardless. I returned to eating healthier several years ago after my metabolism started to slow down in my late 20s, and to my surprise it was fairly easy – my body must have really been craving more veggies, since I go straight for them now!

    For me the biggest struggle is finding the time (or desire?) to prepare more of my meals at home. I am fortunate enough to live in an area with a lot of healthy to-go options, but I could certainly save more money if I weren’t spending $12 per day on lunch. I love cooking, but pretty much only do it for my boyfriend and family on the weekends. I’m somewhat of a perfectionist in the kitchen and spend more time shopping and preparing meals than I need to, so to me home cooking always seems like this big event. Snacking on unhealthy foods (and eating in front of the TV) is a vice of mine as well – I know if I prepared more food for myself, I’d be more likely to eat that instead of junk that tastes good but will only make me feel like crap later.

  47. putting cardio above Resistance Training

    Agreed. I always see people at the gym who come in, do low-impact cardio for hours and then leave, never having broken a sweat. I think for women at least it is partly not knowing how to use the resistance training machines, but also out of fear that they will end up looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger if they do resistance training. In reality, there are very few women who could end up looking like that due to our genetic and hormonal makeup, and many of those women are bodybuilders. I focus on the resistance training too (with high-intensity intervals on the treadmill at the end of my workout for 12 minutes), and my physique actually looks MORE feminine than it did before. The resistance training gave me more of an hourglass figure and bigger butt (probably due to improved waist-hip ratio), whereas before I was pretty much straight up and down. Hiring a trainer was one of the best decisions I ever made for my health, and I’m going to keep going to the gym on those days once our appointments end next month.

  48. As someone who has always been skinny/lean/ripped you guys want to know the secret?

     

    Don’t eat.

     

    I grew up hungry a lot, eventually the sensation of being hungry I could, and can just ignore.

     

    I’ve always exercised tons, and always ate little, and I don’t care about being hungry at all.

     

    I get this all the time too “Man, I wish I had your metablisim!!” says fatty number 1 as he gulps down his second large sweet tea. Oddly enough every time I invite one of these people to the gym with me they decline.

     

    I don’t even like eating, I find it boring, when I want to gain weight, I just drink raw eggs for calories so I don’t have to spend time eating.

     

    And for people who want more veggies, just make green smoothies – not juicing the damn thing, you want the fiber, just blend it and drink, takes all of 10 minutes.

  49.  

    Calories consumed and burned are a significant factor in fat loss or gain. True or false?

    False, it is caused by food toxins: cereal grains and legumes, excessive omega 6 oils and fats, and sugar (fructose being the ultimate culprit). What I am trying to get across is that it’s not about the calories, it’s about how some foods are obesogenic (fattening) and other foods that lack significant levels of toxins are not. Instead, they are healthful and do not cause chronically high levels of insulin to be present in the body, which in return is conducive to weight gain in the form of adipose tissue. I hope this makes sense.

  50. If you have literally eaten 6 times a day, every day, for 20 years straight, then I find that very hard to believe. But I’ll take your word for it.

    Not 6, 4-5 times (which is not that difficult). Six is a lot and only necessary if you’re a pro. Also I consider food shakes as meals (at least if you put food inside them, which is not that hard to do). I do 4 whole meals (cook 3 of them) and one “shake meal”, plus a post-workout shake. Not that complicated.

    Now there’s you’re wrong. I teach time managment for a living, and I promise you that if you carry a timer around with you and track 100% of your time spent:
    – Shopping for food (including travel time)
    – Preparing the food
    – Eating the food
    – Cleaning up the kitchen, mess, dishes, etc
    …you’ll be looking at way, way more than “30-60 minutes a day” if you’re seriously eating 6 times daily with food you prepare yourself. It could easily be double that.

    Bd, come on, re-read my comment. I said cooking and shopping. If you add doing the dishes (which you probably have to do on a daily basis) and eating (which again you still have to do every day) of course it will be a lot more. You’re not being fair here. The difference between eating 3 to 4 meals could be a measly 15 minutes, and you could also do that and be working at the same time (as I do). Also do not forget about internet. Today you can buy any food online.

    Incorrect. That only applies to certain body types.
    I promise you that with my big, low-metabolism, endomorphic body, there’s no way in hell I will get down to a healthy weight without being hungry at least a little bit.

    A little bit, yes, I agree. But if you do everything right you can mitigate a lot of the side effects. What I’m saying is you do not need to feel something terrible to get to a good weight. And once you get to where you want it’s easier to stay there if you continue to do things right.
     

  51. Not 6, 4-5 times 

    4 times is very different than 6, so alright. (5 is still pretty bad though.)

    I do 4 whole meals (cook 3 of them) and one “shake meal”, plus a post-workout shake. 

    Well, now you’re back to 6 meals then (I count a shake as a meal, since it still requires shopping, prep, drinking the entire damn thing, cleanup, etc). So I’m back to being skeptical that you’ve done 6 meals consistently every day for 20 years straight. But again, I’ll take your word for it.

    I do think 4 times a day is doable, considering that some days you might only fit in 3. But 6? No.

    Bd, come on, re-read my comment. I said cooking and shopping. If you add doing the dishes (which you probably have to do on a daily basis) and eating (which again you still have to do every day) of course it will be a lot more. 

    I did read your comment, and what you’re saying is my entire point. You’re not factoring ALL the time it takes to shop, prep, eat, and clean up after all 6 of those meals every day of your life.

    I eat just 3 times per day (intermittent fasting), and I promise you’re spending noticeably more daily cleanup time and prep time than I am. I can make my chicken salad from start to finish in less than 3 minutes, literally (I’ve timed it) and my cleanup time is almost zero (I just toss the bowl in the right into the dishwasher as-is).

    I go to the grocery store only once every 10 days. I have a once-every-10-days prep time where I bulk cook and chop my free range chicken. The entire process takes less than 70 minutes, including all prep and cooking and cleanup time. That’s 70 minutes once every 10 days, plus my 3-minute salads. This would not be possible if I was eating 6 times per day (even if they were shakes).

    I’m not saying it’s impossible to eat 5-6 times a day. I’m saying that most normal humans in today’s busy world either don’t have that kind of time, or don’t want to take that extra time, or will try for a while with good intentions but will eventually snap back to eating 2-4 times a day. It sounds like you have a system that works well for you, and I think that’s great. I could never do it.

    What I’m saying is you do not need to feel something terrible to get to a good weight.

    I completely agree.

    I just have to call folks out when they say “You don’t have to be hungry to lose weight!!!” which is said a lot in fitness circles. It’s simply not true (for everyone).

    And once you get to where you want it’s easier to stay there if you continue to do things right.

    Again I completely agree. I can’t wait to finally reach that point. It’s been a real battle getting there.

  52. Calories consumed and burned are a significant factor in fat loss or gain. True or false?

    False

    Hey, that’s great news! I’m going to start eating 4000 calories of my free range organic chicken a day! I’ll totally lose weight!!!

  53. False, it is caused by food toxins: cereal grains and legumes, excessive omega 6 oils and fats, and sugar (fructose being the ultimate culprit). What I am trying to get across is that it’s not about the calories, it’s about how some foods are obesogenic (fattening) and other foods that lack significant levels of toxins are not. Instead, they are healthful and do not cause chronically high levels of insulin to be present in the body, which in return is conducive to weight gain in the form of adipose tissue. I hope this makes sense.

    You sir are a dumbass. It is most definitely about the calories. As I and the many others currently in the world following an IIFYM diet (If it fits your macros), where you set a certain amount of protein, fat and carbs and follow it, fitting in whatever you can/want. The amount of calories that I set determines whether I am bulking or cutting, and naturally, when they are higher, I gain muscle, and when they are lower, I lose fat. The quality of the foods I eat do not change my results. I have weeks where I eat really “healthy” and “clean” and other weeks where I eat less clean, mcdonald’s, ice cream etc, the scale and my fat moves just the same provided I do get a decent amount of micronutrients in. Here is a heirarchy of important for fat loss/gain:
    1. Calories

    2. Macronutrients/Fibre

    3. Micronutrients and hydration

    4. Nutrient timing and frequency, macro and calorie cycling

    5. Supplements

    Oh and by the way, “toxins” are not a thing. Do you even science?
    Google Alan Aragon’s research review if you actually want some unbiased, scientific knowledge about nutrition.

  54. I eat just 3 times per day (intermittent fasting), and I promise you’re spending noticeably more daily cleanup time and prep time than I am.

    Yep, I know that. And it sucks big time. But it’s a price I’m willing to pay.

    I do think 4 times a day is doable, considering that some days you might only fit in 3. But 6? No.

    If you’re counting shakes as meals, I could count snacks. Heck, if you eat a lot of snacks you could easily fit in 12 meals in your schedule.

    Also it’s my fault for not pointing that out, but I only do that on my regular training routine (9-10 months a year, not counting vacation time). On vacations and holidays I go back to a “normal” routine where I don’t cook and eat 3-5 meals a day. To do this 24/07 the whole year? Then we agree it’s almost impossible, counterproductive and also insane. Everybody needs a break (even pros take breaks).

    I’m not saying it’s impossible to eat 5-6 times a day. I’m saying that most normal humans in today’s busy world either don’t have that kind of time, or don’t want to take that extra time, or will try for a while with good intentions but will eventually snap back to eating 2-4 times a day.

    Completely agree. Again, it’s a matter of priorities.

    It sounds like you have a system that works well for you, and I think that’s great. I could never do it.

    Yep, and it took me a lot of time to get to a point where I could be doing all that stuff without interfering with my other activities. But I will not deny: it’s a real hassle and mentally challenging, especially in the first years.

    I really wish I could trim down a little more of it, but I feel I’ve got to an optimal point where cutting things down would take me backwards. So I’m sticking with it a little longer.

  55. BD is right… cooking at home and eating healthy has been my biggest expenditure of time over the last 20 years (that includes working).  I think it was worth every moment….would guess more than two hours a day total process.

    Here’s my most time/cost/nutrient dense efficient method that I use to eat great. It took me years to get down to this.

    Buy an electric pressure cooker.

    Buy 10-20 local organic vegetables.

    Melt fats in PC (warm button)… Coconut oil, Olive oil, GF butter.

    While thats melting cut veggies… 10 minutes in

    Put veggies in PC mix well. Add half a box of org. soup (16oz), half box of Org. beef broth, and seasonings. I use a lot of Indian spices and curry.  15 mins in

    Cook on high for 4 mins and quick release.  20 mins in

    Wash bowl, cutting board, and knife while it cooks. Still 20 mins.

    After release add coconut milk for some creamy and more seasoning if you need. 22 mins in. Serve.

    Less than 30 mins. Only one dish left to wash. Tons of vegetables and I think it tastes amazing. Fats are key in great tasting veggies IMO.

    Easy to re-heat, take to work, etc  I often reheat on stove with two eggs for protein.

    Sidenote: I don’t eat much meat because of a kidney condition but you certainly can add some to this but have to adjust the cook time. I have found this recipe doesn’t need meat. Trust me, you get enough in your diet… and not enough veggies!

     

     

  56. Some body types will store fat more readily (and in different areas) than others. This may be due to genetics, in response to food types or toxins in foods, as a result of medication or even due to the circadian period in which the food is consumed. The basic rule, however, is that excess energy is converted to fat and deposited in the usual fat stores on the body. You may have to adjust for your personal circumstances as outlined above, but I am constantly amazed that the simple principle of energy excess/energy deficit is beyond the wit of seemingly intelligent individuals, many of whom have no problem understanding energy in terms of mpg or kW/h.

  57. I’d love to say that the fact that I am not fat after having 5 children had something to do with hard work or the way I eat but really its mostly genetics.  I used to work out every day.  I haven’t for months and I actually weigh less than I did when I was working out.  I’m not eating particularly healthily lately either.  I could still probably lose 10 lbs, but my BMI is normal and I am in better shape than a lot of women my age (almost 39).

    For example, yesterday I ate a couple of store bought oatmeal breakfast bars, drank a cold starbucks cappuccino from the gas station, two breakfast waffle lunchables (with bacon bits and syrup) for lunch, and dinner was a homemade hamburger on a wheat bun with cheese, lettuce, tomato and avocado, followed by a couple of homemade chocolate chip cookies.  Oh, and I ate some of the cookie dough and a handful of chocolate chips.

    Not that healthy.  Some of us are just lucky, really.  Others have to work harder because of their body types.  Before I had kids I ate everything in sight but was always underweight and people would ask if I was anorexic.

     

  58. Shameless plug here but some of you may find my new site useful for information regarding the true science on this topic in general.

     

    I’ll be doing some serious updates on it soon.

  59. Hey, that’s great news! I’m going to start eating 4000 calories of my free range organic chicken a day! I’ll totally lose weight!!!

     

    I realize your statement was mostly sarcastic, but it’s still a weak response to my aforementioned posts (and in the context of safe caloric intake) for the following reasons:

    1. You are presuming that you could sustain the consumption of 4000 calories of chicken a day, which equates to a whopping 560g of protein. Since protein toxicity sets in at ~230 grams (920 calories) a day, reaching that many calories of protein would prove to be an impossible task.

    2. A human’s ability of metabolizing protein approx. ends at around 35% protein (by caloric intake). Anything beyond this limit would negatively affect the liver and kidneys, and cause other complications that I won’t get into for the sake of brevity.

    I highly doubt anyone needs to eat that much chicken (even less than half as much) to reach satiation in respect to complete protein.

    In conclusion I give you this brilliant quote by J. Stanton, “Calorie math doesn’t work for weight gain or weight loss.”

     

  60. No one on here has said anything about walking You don’t have to go crazy at the gym in fact you will lose weight control your weight if you put more walking in your day Sitting on your bum is the number one problem for most western men and women ie pit more movement in your day BD if you go for a 1hr walk 5 days a week watch what you eat ,do weight training 3 days a week you will lose weight if you can walk before you have breakfast you start burning your stored fat on your body Try it for a couple of months see how it goes cheers

  61. I think you have to find the balance between eating too many calories, and eating so few calories that you’re using stress hormones all the time and losing muscle (75-80%?).  I don’t think the fitness trackers are perfectly accurate in the amount of calories you burn, but I think it’s good to know your level of activity.  Insulin is also the hormone that stores protein.

     

  62. It is 100% diet and culture. People who are saying it is more than calories are naïve and in denial.

    Calorie is a unit of heat… pure and simple. It takes energy and heat to maintain your body temp, keep the heart pumping, keep digestion churning, keep the lungs breathing, keep your posture and body from collapsing (hence why stand-up desks and standing/active job ppl are infinitely more fit than desk job ppl usually… unless the desk job person really understands nutrition or the active job person really pigs out). It is simple units of heat. I don’t want to hear the dumb “genetics,” baby weight, or hypothyroid or etc etc excuses. It takes a certain amount of calories for anyone just to stay alive; your BMR calorie burn is your burn even if on bed rest.

    As to why Asians might eat more and stay fit? It has been studied. They have no special abilities. They are just more active. They walk and stand and ride bikes and etc more than Westerners on average. They also eat leaner foods and more realistic portions, but it is mainly that they’re more active. When large scale medical studies track Asian immigrants who go from eating a lot of veggies and fish and brown rice to American life of McDonalds and big portions and slacking off, guess what happens? Yep, identical rates of obesity and diabetes as any other race in America.

    Food is a dopamine hit just like any drug or addiction. The very tough part is that you need to go against the grain socially… often eating less and differently than family or friends or coworkers. I get weekly teasing for skipping desserts or bringing my lunch to work, but do you know who questions me? It is very seldom a fit person asking or mocking… that’s for sure. To break the cycle, you simply need to educate yourself on nutrition and use a tracker (and you barely even need that once you’re educated enough and in maintenance mode).

    I agree that fitness is a choice. Good luck ever telling that to a woman, though. Their culture traps them worse than mens’ (BD other article on why women struggle to lose weight is dead on). Women, especially submissive ones, very seldom if ever live alone, so there is usually a sister or roommate or etc encouraging junk food and wine and snacks and buying bacon at the store and forgetting to go to the gym since they went through a break up or are bored this weekend and in the mood for ice cream and bla bla bla. Unless the woman chooses to define her own culture with food and fitness, it is tough. Men have the issue too, but more of them live independent and have less social pressure like shared grocery shopping or etc working against any fitness and health goals.

    Good post, man. Life if full of choices.

  63. I have been with many super hot, super young, super fit women who had a baby, and had 100% prefect, tight bodies except for a little tiny flab on the lower stomach.

    And sagging breasts after breastfeeding.

  64. What do you do when your OLTR gains weight? Or gains a lot of weight? (As she probably will.)

Leave a Reply

To leave a comment, enter your comment below. PLEASE make sure to read the commenting rules before commenting, since failure to follow these rules means your comment may be deleted. Also please do not use the username “Anonymous” or “Anon” or any variation thereof (makes things too confusing).

Off-topic comments are allowed, but Caleb will ignore those.

Caleb responds to comments in person, but he only does so on the two most current blog articles.

Related Posts

Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search.