Sexual success with women is a numbers game. There is no getting around this unless your name is George Clooney. (Man, it’s going to be sooooo fun when he gets divorced… Gotta wait for Jay Z to get divorced first though.)

I have seen a lot of guys execute the numbers game incorrectly and from several different angles. But before I get into what guys do wrong, I’ll explain what you should do.

The proper numbers game means you’re doing the following four things:

1. You’re contacting / opening a large number of women. With night game and daygame that means you’re opening huge numbers of women, well into the hundreds. With online dating that means you’re doing thousands of swipes and/or hundreds of openers. With social circle game that means you are constantly meeting new women through your social circle which you are actively expanding all the time (rather than just trying to have sex with those two or three cute girls you happen to know).

2. You’re putting in these numbers over a long period of time. You don’t just hit it hard for three months, then get laid or get a girlfriend and then stop. That’s not putting in the numbers.

3. You’re actually tracking your activities and results, at least to some degree.

4. You are constantly modifying your approach and techniques to optimize your results, rather than just doing the same exact thing over and over again (unless doing the same thing over and over again is getting you to fast sex with a decent number of attractive women, and is doing so on a consistent and reliable basis, but this is unlikely to be the case unless you’ve been at this for many years).

If you’re not doing all four of these things, you’re doing it wrong. It means that you are not going to get the long-term results that you want. Your results will either be crappy, or they will be good but only good sporadically.

This doesn’t mean you need to put in the numbers like this forever. Eventually, if you’re doing all four of those things, your woman life will be in a place where putting in a massive amount of numbers will no longer be required. I put in an assload of numbers for many years. Today, my woman life, on a scale from one to ten, is an eleven, and I never need to put in a high degree of numbers. At least not today.

I’ll use my favorite Brian Tracy example of the pilot. In order to get a plane off the ground, you need to push it to 100% full throttle. You need to keep it there until you reach cruising altitude. Once you get there, something interesting happens: you can throttle back to just 5%, and the plane keeps flying. You’re flying high on just 5% of the effort that it took to get you there.

That’s how dating skills work. A lot of guys push the throttle to 80% or 90%, hit it hard, but never get off the ground because they’re not willing to go to 100%. After a time at 80-90%, they complain that dating is too hard, or that women are bitches, or that it’s hopeless because their SMV is too low, and just stop having sex or just settle for an average-looking monogamous girlfriend.

Let’s avoid that. Let’s get you off the ground so you can eventually throttle back to 5% and still be getting laid, with attractive women, pretty much whenever you want. It’s a very good place to be.

The Things Guys Do Wrong

Here are the ways in which guys don’t put in the numbers, or do it incorrectly.

The first group are guys who just… don’t put in the numbers. Some of these guys are scared. Some are low-testosterone betas. Some guys are just lazy.

Other guys in this group get way too picky and try to find their Perfect Unicorn Woman and don’t bother with any other women. That’s not putting in the numbers, and that’s not the path to success.

The next group are guys who do put in the numbers and do it well. But they burn themselves out and eventually stop. Yet again, the symptom for this is either a long dry spell or a monogamous girlfriend (who is not your ideal). Either way, you’re settling, and settling won’t make you happy in the long-term.

I see this with a lot of guys in the PUA world. “Dry spells,” going months without having any sex, is common for these guys. Then they eventually can’t stand it, get back out there, get laid for a while, then have another dry spell.

Read my lips: I have not gone without sex for longer than 32 days at any time in the last 12 years. I don’t have dry spells. My entire FB / MLTR / OLTR model protects me from those, but I also put in the numbers.

There were only two times I went exactly 32 days without sex in the last 12 years. One was way back in 2009 when a gigantic snow storm paralyzed my entire city and I was literally trapped in my house for over a week. Then it was Christmas season, which is a dead zone for women.

The second time was when I went on a month-long trip to Asia and Australia. I was so excited I didn’t bother with getting laid but I did as soon as I got home. (I’ve had sex in Asia several times, just not on that particular trip.)

The next group are guys who put in the numbers and keep at it, but they don’t track anything. If you ask them how well they’re doing, they really don’t know. They might get laid or they might not. If you ask them how many openers or dates it takes them to actually have sex with a new woman, they have no idea. They just guess.

As I constantly talk about with my business advice, what gets measured gets improved. What doesn’t get measured usually never improves unless you’re lucky, and you can’t emulate luck. A great way to spin your wheels for years on end without any real improvement is to never track what you’re doing.

That being said, I’ve seen guys go to the other extreme. They become spreadsheet nerds and track the fuck out of literally everything. Some of these guys have shown me their data and it’s hilarious. Pages and pages of all kinds of numbers and stats, like their second date ratio with women who have black hair (yes, I’m serious). These guys spend more time on their god damn spreadsheets than they actually do out in the world with real women.

Please don’t do that. You just need to track some basic numbers, such as:

  • Openers (or contact closes) to dates ratio
  • First dates to sex ratio
  • Second dates to sex ratio
  • How long it takes, in terms of face time, to get to sex with a new woman on average

You can track a few other things if you want, but those are the big ones.

The last category are guys who put in the numbers, work very hard, track everything, but never change what they’re doing.

I remember one guy on the pick-up forums a few years ago in particular. He decided to get really good with daygame, and made a commitment to be an approach machine throughout the entire summer. He spent four months opening women just about every day and tracked everything religiously.

I forget his exact numbers, but he made something like 9,000 approaches… and only got to sex once, early on in the process. He laid out exactly what he did and asked for advice.

He worked hard, which was great. Hell, that’s more than the vast majority of men reading these words will do. He tracked his numbers, which as also good. But the guy did the exact same thing 9,000 times over. Not once did it occur to him that he might be doing something wrong or ineffective, and that he might need to change what he was doing based on the shitty results he was getting.

Nope, he just plowed on, repeatedly doing something that clearly didn’t work.

As I’ve talked about in my History Series, I spent 2007, 2008, and 2009 not only tracking everything I did but constantly modifying my approach. I tested new techniques. I experimented with stopping certain techniques (which sometimes worked better than introducing a new technique, like when I stopped kissing women on first dates).

As a result, I went from a clueless beta male divorced dad to really good at this stuff in less than two years. And today, my entire amazing woman life is mostly on autopilot. I’m at that 5% throttle yet flying high, for the rest of my life. That investment in time ten years ago was well worth it.

So put in the numbers, don’t stop, track your activities and results, and change your approach to constantly improve the results. After a period of time, you won’t need to bust your ass anymore, and the women will still come.

69 Comments on “Putting In The Numbers

  1. Putting in the numbers with online game starts with messaging thousands of online profiles with a first message, an opener. This is what blackdragon calls a Blitz.

    My progession sky rocketted once I established a method to do this automatically. Now I made this service available to anyone willing to buy it. Click on my Gravatar or commenter name above “Lazy Blitz, a Storm of Openers!” to visit my website and order a Lazy Blitz to send an  opener to thousands of online profiles automatically!

  2. I see for myself that it actually motivates me when I do get a girl or two and I find it easier to hit on other women.

    I haven’t been tracking my progress though at least not formally or officially. I have been thinking about it but perhaps it is time to write an overview of what I did and how and what worked and didn’t.

    I do experiment with different approaches but not so much but sometimes something kind of works and I feel like dont fix it if its not broken, but there still are some types of women (age, attractiveness) I do not do very well with. Perhaps they require different approach.

  3. While I’m still a big fan of cold approach and getting the good experience of being rejected in person, that you don’t get from online, for guys reading who’ve so far had OVER 100 lays from just doing online game (be it with dating apps, dating sites, or both), but you don’t consider that you’re higher than an 8 out of 10 in good looks terms, please post a link to your current pics and/or your dating site/dating app profile and also your Instagram (if you have one) if possible.

    If you’re cruising on being very good looking (in that you’re higher than an 8 out of 10), you have an unfair advantage, so you’d be wasting your time posting this, as the very large majority of much more hotter women online, are going to go on looks and external appearance, not on what your written text says about you.

  4. VER 100 lays from just doing online game (be it with dating apps, dating sites, or both), but you don’t consider that you’re higher than an 8 out of 10 in good looks terms, please post a link to your current pics and/or your dating site/dating app profile and also your Instagram (if you have one) if possible.

    Why? And you think most guys have pics of themselves on instagram? My instagram is just landscapes and sunsets.

    f you’re cruising on being very good looking (in that you’re higher than an 8 out of 10), you have an unfair advantage, so you’d be wasting your time posting this, as the very large majority of much more hotter women online, are going to go on looks and external appearance, not on what your written text says about you.

    What’s your point?

  5. My progession sky rocketted once I established a method to do this automatically. Now I made this service available to anyone willing to buy it. Click on my Gravatar or commenter name above “Lazy Blitz, a Storm of Openers!” to visit my website and order a Lazy Blitz to send an opener to thousands of online profiles automatically!

    It seems to be available only on one very specific dating website.

  6. And the opposite side of the coin is what extreme betas do.  I have one chasing my MLTR.  They go all in on “that one special girl” and try everything to get her.  They focus on no other women at all.  Then one day, I show up to the party my MLTR asked me to come to, and the beta is there.  It’s fun to her, to make her beta orbiters jealous, so she makes out with me right in front of him.  It works, he is frustrated, says he’s not sure if he’s wanted at the party anymore, and goes away.  He comes back, we are still making out, he slams a bottle of liquor down and leaves again.  She notices his behavior and decides to give me a bj hoping he walks by again and sees that.  (He didn’t come back by, but his jealousy certainly did me a favor.)

    The guys night was ruined, he drank himself into a stupor because of his misery, and became the laughing stock of the party.  I was somewhat amazed because this guy already knew about me, yet somehow thought it was worth trying for, and then when rejected, wallows in sorrow instead of going and hitting up other women.

    His problem?  He isn’t willing to do exactly what the title of this post says.  He puts one woman on a pedestal, puts all his effort in to her, and is almost always rejected I would guess.

  7. His problem?

    He did so many things wrong: coming to the party if it was gonna be an issue for him knowing she has a guy, thinking she was gonna hit on him on the party (“I guess I am not needed anymore..”), making his irritation show and worse yet verbalizing it, coming back to the party (wtf?! who does that?!)… etc etc.

    He didn’t come back by, but his jealousy certainly did me a favor.

    If she is your MLTR it should be irrelevant – you should be fucking her every single time regardless.

  8. If she is your MLTR it should be irrelevant – you should be fucking her every single time regardless.

    The favor was getting a risky bj at a party when anyone can walk by.  I’m in to that shit lol.  She was mostly going for it as a way to make him jealous.  She’s not as much an “in public” type person as I am, so his jealousy did in fact do me a little favor.

  9. Lazy Blitz – Please do not attempt to overtly sell anything on this blog again. Provide value instead of selling. Thanks.

    And the opposite side of the coin is what extreme betas do.  I have one chasing my MLTR.  They go all in on “that one special girl” and try everything to get her.

    To be fair, many Alpha Male 1.0s go into phases where they do this as well. It’s not just betas.

  10. …um…ur girl behaving like that is a bit of a red flag. Its one thing to not be interested in the guy  and another thing all together to torture the dude.

    She does that to him. She’ll do it to u. She may have even ‘done stuff’ with him already also while leading in on.

  11. Often Overlooked

    Get enough sleep.. Saps your Testosterone and energy otherwise.

    May correct you in a way for being inactive in putting in the numbers

    Sounds off topic but it really does have an effect.

  12. …um…ur girl behaving like that is a bit of a red flag. Its one thing to not be interested in the guy  and another thing all together to torture the dude.

    She does that to him. She’ll do it to u. She may have even ‘done stuff’ with him already also while leading in on.

    You are quite correct.  She may actually be a bit of a dominant, but she offloads it on her betas.  Also correct when you say she may have “done stuff” with him and lead him on.  She is allowed to “do stuff” and I don’t care.  Even though I believe her that she has not.  I agree it probably is a red flag, and you are also correct that she will do it to me.  She has at least twice when LSNFTE, however it never worked.  It is a way for her to completely disqualify a man from her life.  All her ex’s begged for her to not go.  The first two times she left me, she tried to get me to do this also.  The last time she left me, she came by and told me she was leaving me instead of trying the drama route, but you are correct it probably was or is a red flag, I think I have overcome it however.  She does torture dudes, time and time again, but if they put up with it long enough, occasionally she leaves me for one.  It’s weird, I can’t explain it, but she keeps coming back so whatever.

  13. and another thing all together to torture the dude.

    I forgot to add to this…  She doesn’t have many female friends and therefore gets her attention from guys when she is not with me.  So playing them like this and leading them on gives her that fix.  She gets attention and favors, then when she refuses their advances, she gets the drama she wants too.  In fact, that’s exactly what betas are for.  She craves attention, even to the point of baiting guys to chase her just so she can eventually turn them down.  She loves the attention they give and the favors and man-chores they do for her while trying to win her over.  I’ll be honest, I do the bare minimum of almost nothing for her as far as man-chores, so I don’t mind her getting that fix from other men.

    Also to point out, she has never had relationships last more than a few months but ours, minus a few short LSNFTE from her, has been a few years now.  This has a lot to do with her craving of attention from multiple men.  When she has been in monogamous relationships, she still craves attention from other men which causes extreme drama with her boyfriend and it all breaks down.  I let her do whatever the fuck she wants and she sticks around and keeps coming back when she does briefly leave.

  14. Sexual success with women is a numbers game. There is no getting around this unless your name is George Clooney.

    Hookers exist. For some guys they will be a more efficient method of achieving sexual success than game. Getting jobs/starting a business is already a numbers game in and of itself, one that you can not escape unless you are Dan Bilzerian or Donald Trump. For some guys it may not be worth it timewise to play two numbers games (dating and money making) when they can instead focus all of their time and energy into increasing their income, and just pay hookers when they need the sex.

  15. Hookers exist. For some guys they will be a more efficient method of achieving sexual success

    Myself, I wouldn’t consider paying a hooker as “sexual success” any more than I would consider paying a roofer to redo my roof as me having “carpentry or builder success”.  Paying for anything may be a sign of monetary success, but I wouldn’t say it is a success in whatever you are paying for.  Technically it is failure because you have to pay someone to get the job done instead of getting the job done using your own skills or talent.  This is just my own opinion however.

  16. Hookers exist. For some guys they will be a more efficient method of achieving sexual success than game.

    Yes, paying for sex is an option for a certain smaller subset of men who meet two key criteria. I explained that here.

    Myself, I wouldn’t consider paying a hooker as “sexual success” any more than I would consider paying a roofer to redo my roof as me having “carpentry or builder success”.

    He likely doesn’t care about any of that regardless if you do. He just want sex. He’s likely a older man and/or Pleasure of Sex man and you’re likely a younger man and/or a more Thrill of the Hunt guy. No right or wrong, just different systems for different types of men with different sets of life priorities.

  17. Yes, so Caleb is to the point to make the process smoother and 10X (or many more times) more efficient over time.

    Improving the process is the point. (actually that’s the whole point in aging as far as I’m concerned).

    Improving the odds.  Closing better. Also, who’s going to make 9,000 approaches over a 4 months period ? That’s insane. Most guys don’t meet and greet more than 5 new women a week (well, unless they work or live in a casino in Las Vegas or something) ! I don’t think it is realistic to say on Monday: I will approach a minimum of 25 women this week.

    Thoughts ?

     

  18. and going 100% until cruising altitude is what gets you into having multiple Life Areas in really good spots right? instead of being stuck in putting out fires all the time or spinning the wheels as you say

  19. Hookers exist. For some guys they will be a more efficient method of achieving sexual success than game.

    For some guys that is not an option. Not because of some moral nonsense or whatever but because they are simply not turned on by hookers. On top of that some guys rarely have good sex with a new woman so this would be very troublesome.

  20. The lazy part is the hard part. None of us want to admit we’re lazy. Further, I live a fairly robust life, so pure laziness doesn’t seem quite right. For the record, I’m handsome enough that getting IOI’s is never a problem, even in my mid 40’s (and yeah, I’ve had 2 wives and a smokeshow half my age on my arm for 4.5 years, having blundered into every relationship I’ve been in).

    Perhaps it’s simply a matter of internal permission. Perhaps it’s some sort of alchemal transition rite. Perhaps I’m scared, and perhaps I’m lazy. I dunno. But not being able to pull new women is literally the worst thing in my life right now (and it’s not their fault, it’s mine, I’ve pissed women off by not hitting on them).

    If it’s fear, it’s specifically this fear: I was trained as a good little beta bitch. However much I have internalized the Alpha 2.0 life, there’s more than a gnawing feeling that I’m doing wrong by not being more useful to women. As if any woman with a lick of sense has any illusions about what spending time with me will be getting her (again up to me, but I’m much, much better about that part these days, at least…..externally).

    I don’t think it’s just SP, by the way. I think the masculine drive to nurture our families and communities pre-dates civilization by an order of magnitude…..or two. We just live in an entirely different world now.

    I apologize for the rambling, but I think this is it. I’ve never been able to put my finger on it, but here we are. It probably is fear, fear of my mother, fear of feminism, fear of not being a useful little beta bitch. Useless men like me are supposed to go their own way.

    The stupid thing is I present as what I am, a good looking loser.

  21. Just adding to the need of “being a useful beta bitch” just the past few days I’ve seen two men walking and holding their– I assume– girlfriends’ purses and really looked and analyzed it (body language, speech pattern ECT)…I held eye contact with one of the men.

  22. They become spreadsheet nerds and track the fuck out of literally everything.

    I’m afraid I’ll start doing that. I get obsessed with stats to the point where I become a massive spreadsheet nerd. But at the moment, My spreadsheet looks like this:

    Invites (I don’t count approaches, I only count invites)
    Dates
    Sex
    Dates per invite
    Sex per date

    I think this is reasonable without going overboard.

    Man, it’s going to be sooooo fun when he gets divorced… Gotta wait for Jay Z to get divorced first though

    I can’t wait either.

    I don’t know what’s gonna be more entertaining. These famous dudes getting divorced or the manosphere turning into super saiyans in response going “ZOMG she’s taking ALL HIS MONEYZZZZ!!”

  23. he made something like 9,000 approaches… and only got to sex once, early on in the process. He laid out exactly what he did and asked for advice.

    9000?!?! If I approached 9000 chicks I’d have STDs that they wouldn’t have names for lol. I try to invite 20 chicks out on dates a week when I’m hunting hard. That’s right around 1000 a year. Usually it only takes about 8 invites for me to land a date.

    Who goes 9000 approaches and only ONE lay? Did he look like a freak? Was he autistic or retarded? Holy shit.

    It’s fun to her, to make her beta orbiters jealous, so she makes out with me right in front of him.  It works, he is frustrated, says he’s not sure if he’s wanted at the party anymore, and goes away.  He comes back, we are still making out, he slams a bottle of liquor down and leaves again.

    I laughed at that more than I should have. I’m glad I can laugh at that kind of stuff now.

    I’m picturing this right now and I can’t stop grinning lol. Here’s hoping the poor guy learned from that and didn’t do…evil things if you know what I mean.

  24. If it’s fear, it’s specifically this fear: I was trained as a good little beta bitch. However much I have internalized the Alpha 2.0 life, there’s more than a gnawing feeling that I’m doing wrong by not being more useful to women.

    Those are residual beta thought processes you haven’t shook off yet. It will take more time.

    I don’t think it’s just SP, by the way. I think the masculine drive to nurture our families and communities pre-dates civilization by an order of magnitude…..or two. We just live in an entirely different world now.

    It’s not SP and it’s not the masculine drive to nurture. I have that drive as well, but I have zero concern about if I’m useful to women. Instead, my view is that I am useful to them and they are getting the better deal by being with me than I am, and that includes my FBs.

  25. I had this guilt. I will go back to prostitution if i have dry spell (meet girls on dates but didn’t lead to sex) for straight weeks. I mean, I went to it frequently before i found the game in my earlier 20s, now in my mid i have been working hard on this.

    few years back, it took me 250 DG approaches (hit and miss) before i generated the FIRST lay. That dude with 9000 approaches was just too EXTREME.

  26. Lol were you referring to me about the daygame?

    Maybe there was more than one guy like this, but in the last pu forum you were very active in I was regularly posting about my daygame experience, and had a streak of nothing for 2000 approaches straight over two years (9000 over a few months is a bit… Impossible). I actually changed loads of things in terms of what I did, what I said, how I dressed, etc over that time (and I also had times of doing nightgame and tinder as well). Eventually I realized the problem was that I was just shooting too high. In the last few years I don’t bother with “hot” girls anymore, only above average or cute ones (8 Vs 6-7 to me, although our ratings are very different, probably 10 Vs 8 by how you label) , and with the lower standards I don’t ever have a problem getting laid.

    So let that be a lesson for everyone too, don’t set your standards higher than you are capable of achieving, it’s more important to be having sex on a regular basis and so it’s important to be putting in the numbers in your appropriate league.

     

  27. @RedBaron

    You have to pay any way, and you might as well pay in money instead of in hearing mountains of nonsense and pretending it’s not nonsense, doing things like “making her laugh once every few minutes” with what that entails, acting all the required flattery, withstanding all the implicit power-jockeying acts, and countless other things.

    The only difference is that hookers won’t be really turned on, while a successful player with the ability and huge patience to woo may enjoy the company of a woman actually desiring sex with him (if he doesn’t make any tactical error, never lets his patience abandon him, and in any case for a while only).

    It’s the same with men who want a baby. Surrogate motherhood is to be paid for, sure, but in many ways it seems to cost less than marriage.

  28. Yeah it’s a number game, obviously.  That does get tiring.  It requires a bit of energy, work, and a constant correct mental attitude.  You have to like it along with all the things that go along with being successful at it.  I like staying in style, in shape, hitting on women, picking up women out and about, opening women online, talking to women, keeping my finances in order, smelling good, seducing women to sex, first dates (very very important for online game), and etc.  Most guys do not enjoy what I just described, especially since they ain’t making a living off of it,  and do it long enough to get laid a few times and ease into a relationship.

  29. So let that be a lesson for everyone too, don’t set your standards higher than you are capable of achieving, it’s more important to be having sex on a regular basis and so it’s important to be putting in the numbers in your appropriate league.

    I think BD might disagree somewhat.  He has strongly stated that you must be fucking girls you find hot.  I have had a short convo with him about this because I live in a rural low-population area.  I don’t have too many that are “hot” but they are attractive enough for me.  It isn’t ok according to BD except that it is better than no women at all, but in reality I should move to a higher populated area.  However my happiness is pretty great this way anyway.  But I can see how it would be over the top if I was with nothing but smoking hot women, but until I move that just isn’t possible.

  30.  It isn’t ok according to BD except that it is better than no women at all, but in reality I should move to a higher populated area.

    Hot women are like expensive sports cars.  You have to be able to afford them.  High maintenance, high monthly payment, high premium, and etc.

    I’ve noticed hotter women are coupling with better looking men as of late.  I don’t see as many ugly men with hot women as I used to.  Social media?  Constant selfies and tags?  Hot women love social media and having better looking mates, and the potentially cutter kids that comes along with that coupling, increases attention and likes.  Maybe or maybe not?  Either way it’s an interesting discussion.  Of course this would make it much more difficult to pickup hotter women if you’re average no matter where you live.

  31. To the guys waiting for Jay-Z and Beyonce to get divorced and for him to be robbed in the divorce, you’re gonna be disappointed (I could be wrong but not likely) not because they’re a match made in heaven or they’re “so in love” (He’s cheated on her repeatedly already) but because theirs is more like a political marriage rather than a traditional monogamous one. They could even be fucking different people in full knowledge of the other person but acting all cutesy and in love in public. Clooney is definitely gonna get screwed over.

  32. For those talking about hookers, you might be different from me but it’s about accomplishing something and growing. Why learn a new language when Google translate keeps getting better and better?? Better yet, you could hire a translator. It’s not about the actual translation, it’s about walking into the room and connecting with that Chinese client coz your Mandarin is that good. Or seeing the anticipation on a woman’s face as you take off her panties. Yes it’s about ego, but I think you also get a better experience overall than with the alternatives and with abit of maintainance, it’s a skill you have for life…kinda like riding a bicycle or swimming.

  33. There are different levels of hotness. The point is she must turn you on so that you can have hot sex with her. And feel very satisfied afterwards. You should also be able to get turned on with her very easily. She doesn’t need to be your first choice or super beautiful or something like that.

  34. It’s not SP and it’s not the masculine drive to nurture. I have that drive as well, but I have zero concern about if I’m useful to women. Instead, my view is that I am useful to them and they are getting the better deal by being with me than I am, and that includes my FBs.

    Yep, I still struggle with this one. That just being around me and getting some dick is providing value to them haha

    Had a girl thank me for not judging her for wanting NSA sex, unlike other men she’s been with. Still struggle to grasp that stuff like that is valuable to women.

    GD post-divorce brain still fighting me I suppose.

  35. Hot women are like expensive sports cars.

    No they are not. They are simply women that you have to manage just like any other women. Oi is your best friend, not money.

    Able to afford them? What? Are you paying them to be with you?

     

  36. Thanks, BD. Food for thought.

    Regarding day game….

    I was in the pharmacy yesterday, and overheard this from a hot college girl: “I’ll take the Adderall, but don’t even fill the Prozac.” OMFG. That’s why we used to send our daughters to convents. Castle Anthrax is the single sexiest place in fiction.

    Point is, I made this observation (outside of the Monty Python reference) to an old lady in the waiting room and she cracked the fuck up. This is because I have what BD calls a fair bit of OI (although not enough, evidently) or what GLL (the Good Looking Loser, i.e. the best half of the manosphere from BD) called “social freedom.”

    Warm approach is trivial. Then again, I’m lucky enough to be really good looking (although I’ve been under the barbell about 1.5 years now). People fucking love meeting me. Warm approach “It was great meeting you” closes are a dime a dozen. GLL’s advice for busy guys is to talk to 1, just 1, girl each day and invite her for a drink that night, or back to your place for a nightcap if you meet in a bar. Simples. One daily approach until the roster is filled.

    Yeah, I’m also a bit scared of this working, too……BD, is that also residual Beta?

    (btw, I agree entirely that most men should stick to online dating, with all of its attendant problems, unless they are just stupid good looking….just my opinion)

  37. No they are not. They are simply women that you have to manage just like any other women. Oi is your best friend, not money.

    calm down it’s a metaphor.  But in this day and age if you’re not very attractive you’re not consistently getting hot women to respond to your openers and then actually have them meet you.  Doesn’t matter what anyone sells you.  Anyone who tells you that is living in a day long gone, lying to you, poor judge of their own attractiveness, or a poor judge of what is actually hot..

  38. were you referring to me about the daygame?

    No. I don’t remember the guy’s name but I know it wasn’t Tank. It was quite a while ago.

    So let that be a lesson for everyone too, don’t set your standards higher than you are capable of achieving, it’s more important to be having sex on a regular basis and so it’s important to be putting in the numbers in your appropriate league.

    Good god, absolutely disagree on pretty much every level, but that would get too off-topic so I’ll just leave that there for others to discuss if they wish.

    Hot women are like expensive sports cars. You have to be able to afford them. High maintenance, high monthly payment, high premium, and etc.

    Jesus. Factually incorrect. I’ve had many hot women (meaning if I showed photos of them on this blog and did a poll, more than 50% of men would say they’re hot) as both FBs and MLTRs in the past that didn’t require any of these things. If you’re talking about having a hot woman as a GF or wife, then perhaps, but even then it’s still not an axiom.

    What a horrible (and inaccurate) attitude, shared by many men. I cringe every time I see it on the internet.

    To the guys waiting for Jay-Z and Beyonce to get divorced and for him to be robbed in the divorce, you’re gonna be disappointed (I could be wrong but not likely) not because they’re a match made in heaven or they’re “so in love” (He’s cheated on her repeatedly already) but because theirs is more like a political marriage rather than a traditional monogamous one.

    I know, and I’ve made the same observation. It’s the same as Bill and Hillary Clinton. And you might be right; they may just stay together forever in a state of mild conflict because of the fame and business empire despite the fact they can’t stand each other.

    They could even be fucking different people in full knowledge of the other person but acting all cutesy and in love in public.

    I know Jay Z is. Ultra-rich, powerful, famous men don’t do monogamy. (Beyonce probably is too but it’s not 100% guaranteed.)

    Clooney is definitely gonna get screwed over.

    And if he does it’s his fucking fault. He knew better and proceeded anyway.

    Yeah, I’m also a bit scared of this working, too……BD, is that also residual Beta?

    No. That’s a self-esteem issue.

  39. Good god, absolutely disagree on pretty much every level, but that would get too off-topic so I’ll just leave that there for others to discuss if they wish.

    What is there to disagree with?? If a guy has done everything he can to improve his SMV and game and still can’t girls of a certain level of hotness, what should he do? Obviously fuck, date, and have relationships with the kinds of girls he can get, and if he wants to, after meeting strong income goals, which he should anyway, he could get the hotter girls as hookers.

  40. When you are very beautiful and / or a strong SMV and all the day pretty women look at you insistently and / or smile at you (street, public transport …) and that getting dates is very easy, is it necessary to put the numbers?

  41. If a guy has done everything he can to improve his SMV and game and still can’t girls of a certain level of hotness, what should he do?

    I bet such a guy has not done everything. The single greatest thing that makes it or breaks it is (mental) attitude / mindset. That is one of the hardest things to change but it is the thing that makes most difference. The rest is just to help you get into the right mindset. From your comments I can see that your mindset is what is holding you back.

  42. When you are very beautiful and / or a strong SMV and all the day pretty women look at you insistently and / or smile at you (street, public transport …) and that getting dates is very easy, is it necessary to put the numbers?

    When you come to chat up these women do you get dates and sex with them easily? Are they the women you want?

  43. Yes Alpha Omega, almost 100% with submissives women, I eject dominants (obviously), and 30%-35% with Independant women on the past but I don’t date with them anymore. I focus on the submissives 18-22  years old. That’s my “niche”.

  44. I focus on the submissives 18-22 years old. That’s my “niche”

    That’s a very nice niche. What is your secret? Just looking good?

  45. I have no secrets and do not consider myself especially good in seduction.

    What makes it easy is that I’m 26 years old with an angelic face that makes me look 22-23 and being a passionate entrepreneur I easily distinguish myself from the male circle of girls in my “niche”.

    I also have an empathic and reassuring character and I make easily laugh what pleases this type of girl.

    But I have a lot to learn if I want to get the same results at 30, 40 or 50 years (even if the money will make things easier).

    Accuracy: I am in France, which may make things easier than in other countries

  46. When you are very beautiful and / or a strong SMV and all the day pretty women look at you insistently and / or smile at you (street, public transport …) and that getting dates is very easy, is it necessary to put the numbers?

    Yes, but you don’t need to put in as many. Read this.

    I am in France, which may make things easier than in other countries

    Yes, that helps. If you were in Toronto or Copenhagen more numbers would be required.

  47. If a guy has done everything he can to improve his SMV and game and still can’t girls of a certain level of hotness, what should he do?

    What do you think he should do?

    I’m gonna sound like a prick here but this needs to be said.

    Consider my own struggles, the above musing being one. Only I know I’m not doing all I can to improve my SMV so if I only get with overweight/old single moms, I can’t bitch. I’m not putting in enough numbers/effort.

    And neither is anyone who says that they “did all they could.”

    If I have done “everything I can” to get better paying clients for my freelance writing craft and still only get gigs that pay a little over a penny per word, what do you think I should I do?

    If I have done “everything I can” to get more people to buy my e-books and yet I’m still stuck at only one copy sold, what do you think I should do?

    If I have done “everything I can” to average 220 in bowling and yet I’ve been stuck averaging 210, what do you think I should do?

    I’m not impressed when someone says they have done “everything they could” to get a certain result. it reveals a severe lack of resourcefulness.

    There is always, always, ALWAYS something else you haven’t considered when improving a life area. ALWAYS.

    Because of this comment, I now feel compelled to write about this in my blog. Because I’ve been hearing this defeatist phrase from people I know, not just people commenting on Caleb’s blogs.

    Again, sorry if I’m sounding like an asshole here. But I’m just really sick of the phrase “I did everything I could.” When people say that to me, I just translate it to “I give up.”

  48. Question : Is 45 too old for Tinder (i.e. getting women age 30-32 on Tinder)?

    I have never done Tinder.  I did Match.com a few years ago, with decent results, but I think Tinder is the most widely used site in my city (the Bay Area).

    I realize that BD has books like ‘Younger Woman Manual’, but I don’t think I can ever get that good.  I really just want a short fling with a younger woman every few months.

  49. Hot women are like expensive sports cars.  You have to be able to afford them.  High maintenance, high monthly payment, high premium, and etc.

    I don’t agree, and I am pretty sure BD does not either.

    I agree that they want a high-status man, but that does not mean HE has to spend much money.  This can include the ability of the man to enhance her selfies on social media, which has replaced outright money as something women want out of the whole thing.

  50. BD there are huge economic opportunities in India right now.

    I am saying that because I can’t move. Not right now. I know I have to make my business location independent but it’s gonna take time.

    I’m saying this cuz the dating scene here is really fucked up. Girls want commitment before sex. FBs are rare. Should I go mgtow for sometimes or what?

  51. Question : Is 45 too old for Tinder (i.e. getting women age 30-32 on Tinder)?

    I have never done Tinder.  I did Match.com a few years ago, with decent results, but I think Tinder is the most widely used site in my city (the Bay Area).

    I realize that BD has books like ‘Younger Woman Manual’, but I don’t think I can ever get that good.  I really just want a short fling with a younger woman every few months.

    I have extensive Tinder experience and I will tell you that as a man over 30 Tinder is increasingly useless with each year and exponentially so, unless you lie about your age there. When I tell this to my friends they say they don’t wanna lie and then I say then don’t use Tinder. It doesn’t make sense to use it at that age if you don’t lie.

    I’m saying this cuz the dating scene here is really fucked up. Girls want commitment before sex. FBs are rare. Should I go mgtow for sometimes or what?

    You can give commitment without giving full on. I have been doing mostly MLTR because where I am most girls lose it at the idea of being a FB even though thats what they are as long as its not too obvious. On the other hand I see a lot of women who are content with perpetual dating for months without defining the relationship – its great! I like the women to spend the night anyway so this works well for me.

  52. Is 45 too old for Tinder (i.e. getting women age 30-32 on Tinder)?

    No, as long a you keep the women within 10 years of your age. So 36 year-olds would be okay, but 30 year-olds would be tough. Use Bumble or OKCupid instead.

    I’m saying this cuz the dating scene here is really fucked up. Girls want commitment before sex. FBs are rare. Should I go mgtow for sometimes or what?

    Read excuse #15 here.

  53. I believe 100% that George Clooney and Jay Z are in business relationships and the divorces might have less drama than you expect. Also, it’s been highly speculated that Clooney is “bearding” (see Cory Booker and others) for political reasons and he has a track record of multiple 1 year “relationships” that provided exposure for the GFs. A lot of these celeb guys (see also Bradley Cooper, Aaron Rodgers) are rumored to have “contracts” with GFs and the break ups mean simply that “the contract was up.” If you think I waste my time with gossip, you would be right.. if I didn’t have significant business income from content creation and promotion in that and other spheres.

  54. I’m 40 and go after and get 23-25 year old (26 is OK sometimes) women, but I’m told I look 27-36. A cute 22 year-old I only knew in person couldn’t believe I was old enough to be her dad. I have zero interest in women in their 30s and older and really hope I don’t have to go there for a long time.

  55. I’m 40 and go after and get 23-25 year old (26 is OK sometimes) women, but I’m told I look 27-36. A cute 22 year-old I only knew in person couldn’t believe I was old enough to be her dad. I have zero interest in women in their 30s and older and really hope I don’t have to go there for a long time.

    As someone who also looks much younger than he looks and who strongly prefers women who are 10+ years younger (at least sexually) I would like to ask whether in online dating you use a younger age (more like your looks like age) and if yes when do you tell them? I used to tell them early on and that didn’t really work very well and now I keep it until we’ve been having sex for a while and that works very well provided they don’t find out before on they’re own.

  56. …I don’t think I’ve seen it addressed here but: BD didn’t mention what the guys who are very burnt-out should do. Well, I think he said awhile ago to make sure to get a blood test one to check all the hormones/levels which I have and all my levels are actually above-average, but yet I’ve still have felt very burnt-out this past year… most guys probably would feel burnt-out after months upon months of no results but still trying to trudge along

  57. Question :  Is Match.com totally useless at this point?  It was the premier site some years ago, but almost no one mentions it anymore.

    What makes OKCupid and Bumble better than Tinder, these days?

  58. I have and all my levels are actually above-average

    Above average compared to what?  A healthy 20 year old is probably 1100+, I don’t think they want to start treating for low T till you get below 270.

    What are you burned out on?

     

  59. Yesterday i had 2 dates (one first date, 2nd prospect second date).

    Both under 6 hours meeting 2 last minute resistance.

    Was it because the fact i booked a 3hour motel, or it’s just comfort issue.

    Additional info:
    -both girls reciprocate my touches pretty well, just no kissing.

    -I took the IOI signs and pulled them, the 2nd prospect said, ”we can just be friend/you really loved touching me…”

    what does that mean exactly?

  60. -both girls reciprocate my touches pretty well, just no kissing.

    That isn’t good.

    -both girls reciprocate my touches pretty well, just no kissing.

    What kind of friend though? Keep in mind you should ignore what a woman says and pay attention to what she does instead.

  61. @alphaomega

    because both dates were in non bar environment, and the girls will just shyly move away her lips, but we were quite close touching..

    i have been thinking maybe the 2nd girl was just triggered the ASD and straight away gave me LGBF speech. To add this one, 15 mins earlier she was a lil surprised i talked about ”her getting fucked by rapist, maybe a threesome” because she put out the ”fuck” word by her speech. But the vibe was playful and mins later, she said ”you made feel insecure..”

  62. Dudes with more experience than me…

    A FB that’s acting jealous? Had one of my FB‘s go around and like a bunch of my facebook posts (facebook is big for me because my biz)

    A different FB keeps making comments now like “do any of your other girls suck your dick as good as me?” “Maybe you should call one of your hotter girls to come over and fuck” “you are such a man slut” “do any of your other girls let you fuck their ass?”

    The first time she made a comment was mid BJ, and I burst out laughing. Patted her on the head and told her her jealousy was cute.

    But imma drop her if it continues.

    What did I fuck up? How to handle it going forward?

    She’s banging at least one other dude, never any boyfriend behaviors from me.

  63. @CCMidwest: none of the above sounds problematic to me, I don’t see why you’d want to drop her. Not sure you fucked anything up either.

  64. A FB that’s acting jealous? Had one of my FB‘s go around and like a bunch of my facebook posts (facebook is big for me because my biz)

    Why do you have them on facebook? I certainly don’t, I don’t even have most MLTR there. Nor do I get the women I am dating asking me to be added there. Furthermore, you have extensive privacy controls on facebook – you can make sure they cant post on your wall and cant see almost anything and you can do that for individiual facebook friends. So if its a big deal for you, do that.

    A different FB keeps making comments now like “do any of your other girls suck your dick as good as me?” “Maybe you should call one of your hotter girls to come over and fuck” “you are such a man slut” “do any of your other girls let you fuck their ass?”

    Usually the strategy is if you detect jelousy or think she wouldnt handle stuff well you dont answer some or all of her questions. If I was told I am a man slut I would smirk and be like youre damn right and then proceed to her pants.

    But imma drop her if it continues.

    I think you dont understand the concept of FB. With FB nothing she does or says matters unless she causes you real problems or refuses sex. What she says or does beyond that should be irrelevant – thats the point of FB. I honestly hope you are dominant enough with your women – especially with FB that if she says something that annoys you just tell her to stop talking and you say it in such a way that she stops and takes it well. Unless you are doing the dominant girl as a FB thing which is fine but then listening to random crap is part of that so you can use that energy to have angry sex.

  65. BD didn’t mention what the guys who are very burnt-out should do. Well, I think he said awhile ago to make sure to get a blood test one to check all the hormones/levels which I have and all my levels are actually above-average, but yet I’ve still have felt very burnt-out this past year… most guys probably would feel burnt-out after months upon months of no results but still trying to trudge along

    If you’re working for months upon months with no results, then you’re doing something wrong and need to change what you’re doing, as I clearly said in the article.

    Also read what C Lo said about your hormonal levels. It doesn’t matter what the doctors say; it only matters what the numbers are.

    Question :  Is Match.com totally useless at this point?  It was the premier site some years ago, but almost no one mentions it anymore.

    What makes OKCupid and Bumble better than Tinder, these days?

    Wait until next Monday; I have an article going up that day that addresses those exact questions.

  66. none of the above sounds problematic to me, I don’t see why you’d want to drop her. Not sure you fucked anything up either.

    It’s annoying AF

    Why do you have them on facebook? I certainly don’t, I don’t even have most MLTRthere. Nor do I get the women I am dating asking me to be added there. Furthermore, you have extensive privacy controls on facebook – you can make sure they cant post on your wall and cant see almost anything and you can do that for individiual facebook friends. So if its a big deal for you, do that.

    I’m in a town of 150,000…social circle, my biz (daygame essentially), and facebook are my lead gen sources for women. I met one of these FB‘s on facebook first haha

    2 biz pages and a personal page where I mix marketing and “glimpses” of my personal life seems to work well for both biz and women (I pull 6 figures a year or better off facebook, not inclined to change anything)

    If I was told I am a man slut I would smirk and be like youre damn right and then proceed to her pants.

    That’s what I did, yep.

    I think you dont understand the concept of FB. With FB nothing she does or says matters unless she causes you real problems or refuses sex. What she says or does beyond that should be irrelevant – thats the point of FB. I honestly hope you are dominant enough with your women – especially with FB that if she says something that annoys you just tell her to stop talking and you say it in such a way that she stops and takes it well.

    Oh yeah, I get the FB thing. Need to work on my “don’t give a fuck” however, because it annoys the ever living piss out of me.

    Being dominant though…point taken. Probably not. She’s super dominant (I wanted the challenge and the drama apparently)

    She did also try to get me to see her more “I’m going to come over every day and fuck you so you quit seeing that other girl” (she’s a 35 yr old white, average chick…other girl is a cute 27 yr old latina)

    I said “behave and I might keep you on as my Wednesday girl” with a smirk. Then I ignore her requests to meet up if it’s not “her day” haha

  67. She did also try to get me to see her more “I’m going to come over every day and fuck you so you quit seeing that other girl”

    You say you are down to fuck all the time but you are too busy with your work which is very important to you. But you will keep this in mind.

    (she’s a 35 yr old white, average chick…other girl is a cute 27 yr old latina)

    The older and more average they are the more demands they have but then you can realize where that comes from and you just smile to yourself and know shes likely to accept your arrangement even if she complains about it. Latinas are more easy bout this but just wait till shes a bit older… hehe

    I’m in a town of 150,000…social circle, my biz (daygame essentially), and facebook are my lead gen sources for women. I met one of these FB‘s on facebook first haha

    2 biz pages and a personal page where I mix marketing and “glimpses” of my personal life seems to work well for both biz and women (I pull 6 figures a year or better off facebook, not inclined to change anything)

    Don’t fix it when its not broken. That does sound very good. How do you get women via facebook? I didn’t thank that was a reliable way that works? You dont need to change anything you can just set in privacy controls that the women you are dating are in a friend list that cannot do or see certain things.

    What’s your thoughts of going to swinger clubs to get laid?

    Don’t you need to bring a partner to a swinger club? That’s the point of swingers. Or do you mean sex party club? The second is open to everyone and you pay (usually a lot – if you are guy who comes on his own, much less for a woman or a couple) to enter and the idea is there are women down to sex even in public.

  68. How do you get women via facebook?

    I’m a realtor. The goal of my posts on facebook is to get people to comment (picture of 2 kitchens and “which one is your favorite?” type crap)

    I DM all commenters with my biz opener. Then I screen:

    1. Potential client (in the market to buy or sell)

    2. Database only (not in the market and are male or unattractive female…my assistant goes and finds their info and direct markets them)

    3. Potential FB. Attractive, single, not in the market (I don’t fuck potential clients haha). I quickly switch the DM conversation to show my interest and get their cell number. Then I use cell number to schedule the date (to get the conversation away from my biz page and make it seem more casual)

    It works.

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