Pictures of women in your online dating profile

I’ve received this same question from several guys lately…

I have pictures of hot girls in some of my photos on my profile.  Several women online are complaining that I shouldn’t have these on a dating site.  Is it a good idea to have these or not?

Before I answer that, you need to consider the greater question:

Are you getting dates?

If you’re getting dates, and a few women are bitching about how you shouldn’t have pretty girls in your photos, who cares?  That’s their problem.  Delete their emails and enjoy getting laid on your dates.  Always remember the 5% Hater Rule.  Whenever you put up anything on the internet, 5% of people reading it are going to instantly hate it and hate you.  It’s normal and to be expected, and it’s really not  problem.

This is an important point.  You should never stress out about the 5% bad if you’re getting 50%, 60% or 90% good.

For example, when I email VYW, some of them are type 1’s, and occasionally…not often but occasionally…I’ll get an angry response like “Dude I’m 19 WTF??? You’re disgusting!”  The funny part is, that exact same day, I’ll get a response from another 19 year-old, often better-looking, who is very enthusiastic about me and shortly afterwards her and I will be having sex.  Now think about this:  While I’m getting laid, do you really think I’m thinking at all about the that one girl who thought I was disgusting?

In situations like these, always consider results first, bitching second, especially when dealing with females or complete strangers on the internet.  (With online dating, you’re dealing with both.)

To answer the general question of if it’s okay to have pictures of you with hot chicks on your profile, the answer is: If it’s congruent to who you are, do it.  If it’s not, don’t.

I personally have never had pictures with me and chicks on my online dating profiles, but that’s only because it would be somewhat incongruent with who I am.  Not only would it damage my response rates, but it would also cause me to spend several dates with each woman re-orienting my congruence and my frame and thus damage my lay ratios as well.

All bad.  But that’s me.  I’m a 39 year-old, INTJ, masculine, somewhat chubby, results oriented businessman.  If for example you are a good-looking 24 year-old who loves to hit the bars and clubs and parties, having pictures of hot chicks on your profile would be completely congruent with who you are and would likely help your response rates, first-date rates, and lay ratios.  Therefore, you should do it.  The same would go for you if you were a guy my age but a hardcore Harley Davidson type dude.

A few years back when I was laying women I met on MySpace, I read about some techniques used by two guys named Race and Kelly.  They’re not really active any more, but one of their techniques for sarging women on MySpace was to load up your profile with piles of pictures of you and hot chicks (and also your guy buddies having fun).  That technique worked, but only for guys who were younger party dudes.  If you’re a more calm, cerebral guy, or if you’re 45 years old, it’s probably not a good idea.

One more third-party technique I can share.  Full credit for this goes to Pureevil from the forums a few years back. You can experiment with having a picture of you with a very hot chick, crop the chick out, but leave just a little less than half her face in the picture…just enough to tell she’s hot.  It’s much more subtle than having tons of hot chicks on your profile.  Again, it’s not something I could do, but it’s definitely something you should experiment with.

Lastly, make sure you test this stuff.  Experiment.  Change one or two items on your profile, email a bunch of women, and see how you do.  Then change something else, and try again.  Never leave your profile static for long stretches of time unless you’re literally getting laid as much as you want.  I get laid plenty online, but I still test things constantly on my profiles and you should too.

5 Comments on “Pictures of Other Women In Your Online Dating Profile

  1. Got a question about my profile pictures.

    Say I have 4 pictures total, is it ok for one of those to be an action shot (surfing) where my face isn’t clearly visible?

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