For my regular readers, I apologize that I have to divert today’s topic into something like this. This is one of my “link to this” articles that I write in order to prevent me from having to repeat myself in the future. From now on, if anyone says or implies that I’m lying, I can just link to this comprehensive article and move on.
Over the years, a few angry guys in the PUA / pick-up / daygame / night game / seduction world have become upset with me and have accused me of lying about everything (or at least have strongly implied that I am). As my public footprint continues to grow, this complaint will probably increase as well. Here is my official response.
As I have said before, I am not a pick-up artist. I do not teach cold approach game. I have never taught this, and I’ve been very clear about this. Real PUAs or PUA gurus or seduction gurus have much more game than me, teach better pick-up techniques than me, and in many cases have had sex with more women than me.
I have never done night game, don’t teach it, and never have.
I have only done concentrated daygame for a few months way back in 2009 where I did have sex with a few younger women. I have published zero articles about how to do daygame (other than one brief one about ten years ago on a forum that no longer exists, talking about what I was doing back then).
Of the seven books I have written, I only mention daygame in two chapters in one of them. Other than that, I do not teach daygame, never have, and never purported to be a daygame expert, even when I am directly asked about daygame.
On the first page of my original versions of my dating ebooks, I even said on the first page of those books, “I am not a PUA.”
I’ve been very clear about this and always have been. I don’t teach pick-up. I teach comprehensive lifestyle design for men, of which getting laid and quality relationships with women is but one of several key components (in addition to outcome independence, location-independent income, and so on). So if anyone attacks me for not teaching cold approach game, my answer is, “Yes, that’s correct. Duh. I’ve been very clear about that. Why are you upset?” (I will answer that question at the end of this article.)
If you still think I’m somehow lying regarding my dating history or techniques, here are the things you must specifically respond to in order to prove your point:
Item One: For the past ten years, since 2009, I have consistently written thousands, yes, thousands of articles, blog posts, and forum posts regarding my experiences with women and the techniques I recommend. Moreover, unlike most other bloggers in this space, I have never taken a break. Unlike many other PUA or manosphere bloggers I could name, I have never:
- “Taken a little break.”
- Gone on “hiatus.”
- Gotten “busy with work” and didn’t post for a few months (or years).
- Shacked up with a monogamous girlfriend who I thought was “the one” and vanished off the internet, only to return a year later after an embarrassing break-up.
- Become traditionally monogamously married and left the scene. (And get divorced later, of course.)
- Shifted my content to politics, losing my soul in the process.
- Suddenly changed my mind about the dating advice I was giving and started teaching the opposite.
- And so on.
(Oh my, I could name so many big name guys guilty of one or more of these things… but as is the case so often, I have to be the adult in the room so I won’t.)
I have posted consistently about these topics since late 2009, every week, with no breaks at all during that entire time. I have also written seven books during that time. I am an organized businessman here to run a serious business, with a long-term Mission and plan. This Blackdragon endeavor has always had a 15 year time horizon on it when I started in 2009, and I always do what I promise. Thus, I will be posting this kind of content until at least 2024, just as I’ve promised all along. (2009 + 15 years = 2024.)
So I’ve written mass quantities of content about this for an extremely long time. If I was lying about all of this, nine or ten years ago I would have been called out for all of my inconsistencies within just a few months. (I’ve seen this happen with other guys in the PUA world who tried to start blogs or ebook businesses, who really were lying.)
Even if I was mostly telling the truth and only lying about, say, 20% of this, then based on that sheer amount of content, I would have to be some kind of super-genius with a perfect, photographic memory in order to keep all those thousands of details completely consistent over a 10+ year period. I’d have to be some kind of superhuman.
Since I’m not a superhuman, I have indeed made a small handful of mistakes over the years regarding minor details because of lapses in memory (it’s hard to remember stuff from 10 years ago, even when you keep journals and spreadsheets like I do). But if I was lying about this stuff, anyone would be able to go through my vast amounts of content and provide pages and pages of clear inconsistencies and falsehoods. No one has ever done this, including the guys who have hated me for a very long time.
Why is that?
If you think I’m lying, please explain how I’ve been able to lie so often and consistently for over a decade and be able to keep all of those lies straight.
Item Two: The only actual point I’ve ever seen made against me that is not an emotional rant is the argument that I have not publicly shown pictures or videos of women I’ve had sex with.
I have sex with (largely) American women on American soil. I do not go to places like Romania, Ukraine, Columbia or Russia to get laid, where I would be (reasonably) free from lawsuits by posting pictures of my sexual conquests.
I have been advised by several different attorneys that because of my status of being a high-income American businessman and public figure living in America and having sex with large numbers of American women that I would be at great risk of lawsuits if I started showing you pictures or videos of the women I’ve had sex with now or in the past. And yes, this includes the option of showing a picture of an American woman, pronouncing to the entire world that I’ve fucked her, and putting a little black bar over her eyes. She could still easily make things legal if she wanted, and would be encouraged by modern-day #MeToo society to do so.
Moreover, some of you non-Americans guys don’t seem to understand what the word “lawsuit” means in an American context. It is perfectly legal for me to put pictures of women I’ve been with on my web sites. That isn’t the problem. The problem is that lawsuits have absolutely nothing to do with breaking the law. In the USA, I can sue you for any reason I want even if you clearly haven’t broken any laws. Even if I lose and you “win,” and even if you never actually have to go to court, you still have to pay thousands of dollars in legal fees. It’s ridiculous and unfair, and perhaps now you see the problem (and yet another reason why I’m soon moving out of this insane country).
I have indeed shown pictures of many of the women I’ve had sex with when I do private seminars (not every seminar I’ve done, but many of them), as those men who have attended can attest. But posting them online is a completely different scenario.
As I’ve said before, dude, I would love to post pictures of the women I’ve had sex with. I have pictures of almost all of them in my encrypted files. I’m a guy and I’m an arrogant fuck. I’d love to brag. But unless you’re willing to pay all of my legal fees and loss of income if I am threatened legally, I don’t know of any easy way to show these pictures/videos publicly.
Secondly, I know for a fact that the majority of the guys who are really angry about this wouldn’t be satisfied if I did show pictures/videos. They would simply accuse me lying again, that I was hiring models or whatever, since it’s easy to accuse someone of “lying” when you don’t like that person or that person’s advice (as well as another reason I’ll explain at the end of this article). Therefore, I would take all of this legal risk for largely no reason.
But I’ll make a deal with you. If anyone would like to put up a bond or escrow account that would cover all of my legal bills and/or loss of income while dealing with legal threats (I don’t know how much, but it would be measured in the thousands of dollars), as soon as I’ve confirmed the funds are available, I will immediately post pics on this blog of at least 20 women I’ve had sex with, and I’m taking about normal Blackdragon online dating, not any kind of sugar daddy game. I will even give you a percentage of any temporary increase in sales that might occur because of the publicity gained (if any).
If you’re interested in doing this, seriously, email us and my staff will put you in touch with my attorney to work out all the financial details. (You won’t talk to me. I’m too busy.) This is not a joke and I am 100% serious.
And if your response is, “I don’t want to take that risk!”, then congratulations, you’ve just proved my entire point.
Item Three: On all of my books/ebooks (with a few unusual exceptions) I have, and always had, a 100% lifetime money-back guarantee. Not a 30 day guarantee. Not a 60 day guarantee. A lifetime guarantee that literally never expires. This is always honored (with a few rare exceptions of a few guys trying to buy different books over and over again and always conveniently asking for refunds on all of them, but this is extremely rare).
This is because I follow my own business advice, that you should always offer the absolute best guarantee on the products you sell since your sales will increase more than the few scammers who ask for their money back just because they’re ripping you off and want your content for free. If you’re selling proven, quality information, you have nothing to worry about by offering really fantastic guarantees.
No one else in the entire manosphere / PUA with an audience of any real size offers a lifetime guarantee on their products (that I know of). This includes some of the guys who say or imply that I am lying.
My return rate on these books was around 3% for many years. That means 33 guys had to purchase a book from me for one to ask for a refund. Moreover, back then, most of the guys asking for refunds did so not because of the content but because of some aspect of the presentation they didn’t like (they found some typos and got upset, or they didn’t like the font I used, etc, and yes, I’m serious).
I say “back then” because since updating and re-writing my new versions of my dating books (here), my return rate has dropped to just over 1%.
If I’m a liar, if I’m just making up all these fake techniques that don’t work, please explain why I’m getting a 1% return rate on my books when I should be getting 10%, 20%, or 30% returns once guys try my stuff and none of it works.
Item Four: I openly talk about occasionally paying for sex via sugar daddy game and have for about 2-3 years now. Granted, I never started paying for sex until I was in my mid-40s or so (I’m much older than the majority of you reading this, and in a very different phase of life), but I have still done it and continue to do it to some degree, and plan on doing more of it in the future. This has enraged some folks in the PUA community, as I knew it would.
If I’m a liar about me being such a badass with all the attractive women I’ve had sex with for free, why on Earth would I publicly admit to paying for sex? And talk about it as much as I do? That makes no sense. If I was a liar, why wouldn’t I just be banging these women, keeping the financial aspects a secret, and pretending to the world that I wasn’t paying them? Please explain.
Alrightee, those are the fact-based responses. If you still think I’m a liar and making some or all of this stuff up, you have some very difficult arguments to make based on all of the above. I’m happy to hear you make them as long as you refrain from blatant trolling or ad hominem personal attacks (which are not allowed on this blog and never have been).
I’m also happy to talk to any other PUA / manosphere content provider (who has a real audience, that is; not just any random guy with a blog they just started) if they are still upset or concerned about any of this. My door is always open to you guys.
So those are the facts. Now for an opinion. This is just an opinion and I could be wrong since I can’t read people’s minds, so bear that in mind.
The reason most of these guys are angry with me or are calling me a liar is not because they think I’m a liar. Otherwise they’d have much more evidence from my decade of consistent content and sales other than just “I’ve never seen pictures.”
Instead, it’s because they are mostly Thrill of the Hunt guys who strongly believe that teaching men dating methods that do not include cold approach is somehow a shitty thing to do. They think that getting laid via online dating is not real game (which it isn’t, based on their definition of the word “game”) and that teaching men how to get laid with attractive women without having to walk up to a stranger in real life is somehow hurting men, or teaching them to be pussies, or something… I’m not really sure.
Some of these guys are now even more upset because of the increased about of attention I’m getting and money I’m making due, in part, to teaching non-cold approach dating methods for men.
I understand. While I don’t completely agree with this argument, since getting laid with online dating does require some measure of real-life woman skill (otherwise you’d just have a bunch of first dates that went nowhere), I do understand this argument, understand its merits, and I have no problem with it.
The problem is that using facts and logic often don’t work on these guys because the argument they’re saying, which is: “This guy is lying!” is not the argument they’re actually thinking or making, which is: “This guy shouldn’t be making all this money or getting all this attention teaching techniques I don’t like!!!” This is why, when you point out facts and logic, these guys often just ignore what you just said and turn around and launch ad hominem attacks, because they can’t defend a point they’re not really making.
These conversations would be much easier if these guys were more honest about the argument they’re actually trying to make. If someone said, “Blackdragon sucks! He teaches online dating and that’s not real game! No one should listen to him!” that’s perfectly fine. Everyone is entitled to their opinion.
But if you say or imply that “Blackdragon is a liar because he’s making money selling dating material but I’ve never seen pictures!” then you’re just making yourself look very silly. And if you think that’s incorrect, great, scroll up and respond to all the facts I laid out above. I can’t wait to hear your rational, logical, fact-based arguments.
As a quick aside to those of you building Alpha 2.0 businesses, if you’re selling hard products this doesn’t really matter, but if you’re selling anything having to do with you or your personality online, remember that having haters is a key part of your business strategy. Haters make you money. Haters provide lots of free traffic and publicity. People like Glenn Beck and Ann Coulter have made millions upon millions of dollars directly because of their haters. Donald Trump became elected to the Presidency because of the publicity generated by his haters. Tim Ferriss has said that if he doesn’t have at least one person calling him a liar in every article he writes then he’s not doing his job. He’s right.
Every time I’ve been attacked on some website somewhere in some dedicated way (and it’s only happened 3-4 times in 10+ years) I always experience at least an 17% boost in book sales, sometimes as high as 24%. This includes when it happened last week (an immediate 19% spike in book sales and a similar increase in blog and mailing list subscriptions).
Having haters is great. If you have zero haters and everyone on the entire internet loves you and no one thinks you’re lying, that’s bad because you’re losing money. So always make sure you have haters, and make sure they talk about you often. I realize that sounds counter-intuitive, but as I’ve always said in regards to my business advice, the numbers don’t lie. Remember, you’re here to make money, just like I am. Let your angry, unfulfilled haters pound their desks and rage while you swim in their cash with a big smile on your face. It’s pure Alpha Male 2.0.
That’s about it. After this article I don’t need to talk about this again and we can get back to talking about techniques. For you new readers, and I know there are a lot of you, go to the desktop version of this site and hit the subscribe button in the upper right corner if you want real-world, proven woman and business techniques sent to you on a regular basis, plus four free ebooks. To the regular readers, I will now return to the regular how-to topics. Sorry about this diversion. This eventually had to be done, and I might as well get it over with now. I appreciate your patience.