I considered not publishing this because I know it’s going to rub a few guys the wrong way. But I thought about it, and decided it would be good to be as transparent with my audience as possible in regards to the thought processes I use when I write articles for my blogs or when I talk to people on the internet. Transparency with my audience, at least as much as feasible, is important to me.
When I write online, over time, I’ve come to categorize the various groups of men who tend to disagree with either me or people in the manosphere / PUA who are similar to me. Doing this has really helped, in that it’s allowed me to save a lot of time when communicating with these guys and when writing my own content.
Below is a list of the categories I’ve had in my head for a while. As you read through them, you’ll definitely recognize many of them if you’ve spent any time on manosphere web sites. (Note: To those of you wondering why I would write an article like this, it’s another one of my time management link-to articles that save me commenting time in the future.)
1. “SMV Is All That Matters!” Guys
These are men who think that sexual market value (SMV) is literally the only factor when it comes to having sex with attractive women. They believe that if you are having sex with attractive women this must mean that you are either extremely good-looking, or you are wealthy beyond belief, or you are famous. That’s it. There can be no other reasons. Since to them, there is literally no other way to have sex with attractive women.
Confidence doesn’t matter at all. Outcome independence doesn’t matter at all. Pick-up skills, dating skills, relationship management skills, and all other woman skills are all “bullshit” and clearly don’t matter either. None of that stuff works, and if you say it does, you’re obviously lying, regardless of the mountains of evidence to the contrary. You have to be gorgeous or rich or else you either can’t get laid or can only get laid with average-looking or ugly women.
My standard message to these guys is what I said here already, which is:
If you seriously think that SMV is the only factor in determining whether or not a man gets laid with at least cute girls, then you need to explain the chubby homeless guy who was banging all these girls that I talked about here. You need to explain the pick-up artists who I have personally met (not just read about on the internet, but personally met) who were so poor they slept on their friend’s couches, who were banging hot girls left and right. You need to explain the YouTube videos of these attractive, ripped guys who can’t get laid. You need to explain the myriad of very rich men on the sugar daddy sites who also can’t get laid. You need to explain the fat guys (not overweight, but fat) who were not rich, who I have personally coached, who ended up having sex with multiple girls who were cute enough that I would have sex with them. You need to explain the men in their fifties I personally know who are not millionaires, who are dating women as young as 25 with no problems.
Seriously, you need to logically and rationally explain these things. If you can’t, you have to admit that SMV is a factor, but not the only factor or the deciding factor.
2. “Looks Are All That Matter!” Guys
These guys are even worse than the “SMV Is All That Matters!” Guys. These guys think that the only men on planet Earth who have sex with hot girls are hot men. Non-hot men can’t get laid with hot girls, period. It’s impossible (unless, perhaps, if you pay them). Literally nothing else matters. Just your looks.
After all, since men prioritize physical appearance with girls, girls must therefore prioritize physical appearance with men, since women and men are the same.
Yes, these guys seriously use that logic.
These are the guys who seethe with anger when they see good-looking “Chads” on Instagram, thinking (incorrectly) that these “assholes” are “taking all the hot girls.” They are also bewildered and angered when they hear guys like me (who are overweight or have other issues with their looks) say that we have sex with hot women, since clearly we must be lying, since clearly that’s impossible.
I addressed the issue of looks here, but the bottom line is that, yes, looks is a tremendous key factor, and you must optimize your looks to be good with women, but looks is not the be-all unless you are hugely fat or physically deformed.
3. “Pick-Up Artists Shouldn’t Make Money!” Guys
These are a sub-group in the PUA community who are enraged that some PUA gurus actually make money selling pick-up material. They automatically think that just about every person on the internet selling any kind of pick-up or dating advice is lying and ripping everyone off. (Some of them are also “SMV Is All That Matters!” Guys who think all dating / pick-up advice is “bullshit” since SMV is all that matters).
Internet marketing techniques drive these guys absolutely insane. The only advice they trust (what little advice they trust) is the pick-up advice given out for free from someone who doesn’t sell anything. The instant you try to sell something though, boom, now everything out of your mouth is a lie and no one should trust you or purchase anything from you.
These guys often identify themselves by using their two favorite words which are “scammer” (which means anyone who sells pick-up/dating advice) or “snake oil” (which means any pick-up/dating advice that is not given away for free).
Many of these guys are over-reacting to the over-the-top marketing of PUA companies and gregarious gurus from the past several years (I won’t mention any names), whose advertising screams that you can “get any girl you want” and how you can learn to bang 10s after a three day bootcamp or whatever (which, yes, is clearly bullshit, but that doesn’t mean everyone who sells dating material is a liar).
A lot of these guys tend to be anti-capitalist Europeans. Others are guys who have been burned by one or more of the bigger PUA companies. Still others are PUAs themselves who tried to make money selling PUA products at one point, failed, and are now jealous of the ones who actually succeeded.
4. Angry MGTOWs
I split MGTOWs into two very different categories. The first category is the happy, positive MGTOWs, of which I am a part and who I will describe in a minute. The second category, and sadly the larger one, is the angry MGTOWs.
Angry MGTOWs are men who think that pretty much all women are evil and none of them can be trusted, at all, ever. The extreme ones are celibate and actually don’t have sex and just focus on jerking off to porn, which, of course, is insane as it is unhealthy. The less extreme ones say that if you must fuck women, then fine, fuck prostitutes or only have one night stands or similar.
Angry MGTOWs believe that if anyone gets into any type of ongoing relationship with a woman, particularly if you live with her, you’re being “blue pill,” even if you’re open / polyamorous, are having sex with multiple women at all times and are under no financial risk from any breakups. Nope, none of that matters, because women are EVIL and they’re GONNA GET YA!!! AAAHHH!!! WOMEN!!! SCARY!!! RUN AWAY!!!
Angry MGTOWs also think that making more than an absolute minimal amount of money is stupid (because the system, man!) and that the smartest men are the men who purposely stay poor. Yes, I’m serious.
I addressed all the insane concerns of the angry MGTOWs here.
5. Positive MGTOWs
Positive MGTOWs are red pill men who avoid traditional relationships with women, but still have sex with and date women in happy relationships where they are either nonmonogamous or casual, and protected from any financial fallout. They also make good money or at least try to.
I am a positive MGTOW. Positive MGTOWs are my tribe. I love these guys. The reason they’re in a list of guys who disagree with me (or people like me) is because often these guys will think I’m disagreeing with them, when in fact I am not.
When I attack the angry MGTOWs, I regularly get comments or emails from positive MGTOWs thinking I’m talking about them. They’ll say things like, “Hey BD, why are you bashing MGTOW? I’m a MGTOW, and I have three women on rotation, make six figures, and travel the world. What’s wrong with that?”
Nothing’s wrong with that. I’m not talking about you. I’m talking about your more angry MGTOW brothers, not you. You’re doing everything right. You’re likely Alpha Male 2.0 (which is a type of positive MGTOW). Well done.
These are the perpetually angry right-wingers who I talked about here when I talked about Jordan Peterson. These guys live in a constant state of frustration since losing the culture war as they look around their new left-wing world.
They are under the delusion that if people just start getting married, having white babies, and vote for more Republicans, they can turn everything around (which is factually and logistically untrue, but they don’t care).
Because of this delusion, when I tell men to avoid traditional, monogamous marriage because of its inherent dangers, or wait until you’re 40 to have kids, or in some cases don’t have kids at all, these guys fly into a rage and accuse me of destroying Western civilization (regardless of the fact that Western civilization was already well fucked by the time I got here).
The sad thing is that I actually agree with these guys on most fiscal issues. I wrote them a love letter here.
7. Hypersensitive SJWs
I get anger from both the right and the left. The hypersensitive SJWs are always closely watching for anything I say that could be deemed racist or anti-woman so they can “catch” me (even though my son is black, my last serious girlfriend was Asian, my entire Alpha 2.0 philosophy is to let women do whatever they want, etc).
Whenever I talk about big government not working, or Hillary Clinton being a criminal, they get bent out of shape and demonstrate just as much irrationality as the tradcons, if not more so.
Hypersensitive SJW’s overwhelmingly tend to be short-tempered Millennials in their 20s, usually non-white but often European as well.
8. Angry Recently Divorced Guys
I know these guys well because I used to be one myself. These are guys who are victims of monogamy who just went though a problematic divorce from an irrational ex-wife. For about 1-2 years, they can’t think rationally about the subject of living with a woman or marriage. Any time they see anyone attempting something like this (even if its an OLTR one), they start screaming about what a horrible thing the man is doing and how its going to blow up in his face no matter what he does or what precautions he takes.
The good news is that about a year or two after the divorce, most of these guys return to normal (I did) and are able to view the world rationally again. However, some of these guys don’t do this, and become lifetime Angry MGTOWs instead, often flocking to MRA (men’s rights activism) as their new home (and not a happy one).
9. “I Know Everything Because I Went To College!” Guys
These are high-IQ Millennial bookworm types, usually in their twenties, who think they know everything because they’ve been to college and read some books and articles. They almost universally tend to be left-wingers (which shouldn’t surprise anyone).
These are guys who hold hypothetical, utopian beliefs such as the United Nations should run everything, global climate change can be instantly reversed if we just pass a few regulations, gun violence in the US will end if we just pass a few new laws, the welfare state is fantastic, and Bernie Sanders is an economic genius. They think that if the minimum wage is raised it will be a great idea and fix everything because their socialist college professor said so.
They will write long, complicated paragraphs about tiny side-issues in articles or comments they read, and get frustrated when people don’t engage in their pedantic and insane off-topic conversations.
Most of these guys will never make more than $30,000 a year in their entire lives despite their higher intelligence.
Such a shame.
10 “Don’t say ANYTHING bad about my country!” Guys
These are men who think their country (or culture) is near-perfect and the best in the world, and anyone criticizing their country must be instantly and viciously attacked. They are absolutely brainwashed with cultural Societal Programming. Anytime they see any comment or article that contains even one sentence stating something negative about their country or region, even if the statement is 100% factual, these guys uncontrollably leap into the forum or comment section to defend their Perfect Country. If you try to debate them on the facts, they get upset and refuse to do so, continuing to talk about how their country is great and anyone saying anything bad about it is automatically wrong.
I address these men in Chapter 27 of my book, under the section titled “Your Country Sucks.” If I have the objectivity to say my country sucks (which it does, that’s why I’m leaving it) you should be able to do this as well. But the “Don’t say ANYTHING bad about my country!” Guys don’t have the rationality or objectivity to do that.
The worst offenders are Scandinavians, guys who live in Eastern Europe (particularly the ones who moved there on purpose), and American right-wingers, in that order (though there are others, including some men from places like India, Australia, and the UK).
11. Irrational Trump Supporters / Irrational Obama Supporters
When I say Trump or Obama supporters I don’t mean Trump or Obama voters. Lots of guys voted for Trump because they are Republicans or because they didn’t like Hillary. No, I’m not talking about those guys. When I say supporters I’m talking about the tribalists who think Trump is the shit and/or Obama walks on water.
I lump Trump and Obama supporters in the same category because they are the same people. Seriously. They act the exact same way, react the same way, think the same way, say the same things, and use the same excuses. It really is amazing. The only difference is the individual they choose to worship.
Irrational Trump/Obama Supporters are men who worship Trump or Obama regardless of what he does, even if he does things that are the direct opposite of what these men want or of what they promised. When George W. Bush bombed Iraq, Obama Supporters went insane with fury, with calls of impeachment and war crimes. But when Obama started bombing civilians in seven different countries all over the middle east, these guys just shrugged and said he was still a good president.
The same goes for Trump supporters when Trump bombed Syria for no reason, when he didn’t build the wall, or when he fired Steve Bannon. In all these cases, when a rational Trump supporter would stop supporting Trump, they just copied Obama supporters, shrugged, and continued to worship Trump like some kind of god.
Irrational Trump/Obama Supporters have no policies or actual political views even though they pretend to. Instead, they just worship an individual because its fun, and defend that individual regardless of the validity of the criticism leveled against him.
And that’s about it! Most of the anger you see on manosphere sites can be categorized in one or more of the above 11 categories. Do with that what you will.
And by the way, if you’re ready to post an angry comment bashing one of the above types of men, then you’ve missed the entire point of this article, since you will likely be identifying yourself as just another type angry guy on this list.