If you’re curious as to the reason for this post, or to the wording I’m about to use, realize that because of recent events as reported in the media, and on the advice of my legal counsel, I have been forced to make a public statement like this for legal reasons as a public provider of dating and relationship advice.
I really wish I didn’t have to make a statement like this, but regardless, everything I’m about to say I believe with 100% conviction.
Over the last three years or so, there has been a disturbing amount of cases regarding PUAs, or men somehow associated with PUA, who are either defending rape, recommending rape, teaching techniques that are equivalent to sexual assault, and in some recent cases, actually committing and being found guilty of rape.
To be clear:
1. I hereby disavow and repudiate, with every fiber of my being, the act of rape. I lay out my precise definition for the terms “rape” and “sexual assault” in this article. For the rest of this blog post, I will be using those definitions for “rape” and “sexual assault” in that article. If you continue to read this blog post, it is assumed that you have read the linked article above and understand what my definition of rape and sexual assault is, and that I’m talking about said definition, not any other definition.
2. I hereby disavow and repudiate, with every fiber of my being, the act of having sex with a woman who cannot consent, such as women who are very drunk or unconscious. (I’m not talking about having sex with a woman who’s had a drink or two. That’s not rape, and that happens a million times a day all across the world. I’m talking about having sex with a woman who is so drunk that she cannot consent to sexual acts.)
3. I hereby disavow and repudiate, with every fiber of my being, any techniques that physically force an unwilling woman to have sex with a man or engage in sexual acts with a man. I do not teach any technique that comes even close to this description in any of my blogs or books.
4. I hereby disavow and repudiate, with every fiber of my being, anyone who says rape (as defined in the above linked article) is acceptable, or acceptable under certain conditions.
This applies even if said statements are made by someone else on a website I own, or have owned in the past, or have/had some other connection thereto. As I’ve already clearly stated in Part Three of this article, I own numerous web sites with millions of readers per year, and I do not have the ability to personally police everything said on all of these sites, nor do I wish to as a proponent of free speech. Just because you might be able to find something written by some random dumbass, buried deep in a web site I own or used to own, doesn’t mean that I agree with it. I do not. I stand by what I say. I do not stand by anything anyone else says, even on a website I own or have been associated with.
5. I hereby disavow and repudiate, with every fiber of my being, any person in the PUA community or manosphere who does any of the above four items, or who endorses anyone who does any of the above four items.
6. I do not teach any technique, nor have I ever, in any of my blogs or books, that recommends or endorses anything having to do with forcing an unwilling woman to do anything with a man. Indeed, I teach the exact opposite; the entire Alpha Male 2.0 man and lifestyle I teach and recommend purposely and consciously involves not telling women to do anything, but to instead find women who already want what you want, spend time with those women, and quickly moving on from women who don’t want what you want, including and especially those women who don’t want to have sex with you.
On a personal note, it’s quite disappointing that I have to take the time to make a statement like this. When I first started reading stuff from the PUA community starting way back in 2006, PUA was simply a group of guys who were helping other guys get better at dating and meeting women, which is a skill most modern day men are in desperate need of. Some of the techniques that were taught back then were silly and stupid, but there was no malice in anything that was taught or the messaging behind it. There was actually a fun vibe to it all.
In the last three years or so, as I’ve already talked about several times before, this has radically shifted, which is both unfortunate and disturbing. Some in the PUA community and manosphere, not all, but a few, have decided to defend rape (as defined by the linked article above) or promote techniques that are equivalent to sexual assault. I want no part of it, I have no part of it, and I never will.
So to be clear, I’m not disavowing all PUA. I’m just disavowing the rapey stuff. Non-rapey dating skills are very important, and a necessary skill men need today. We’ve all seen the pain, unhappiness, dysfunction, and even death that occurs when men don’t know how to get laid, and/or have no skills with how to successfully relate to women.
Sorry for the negativity and legalese in this post. It had to be done. Next time we’ll return to the usual, helpful Blackdragon articles. I’ve got a big, important article going up on Monday that I’ve worked on for a long time, to help set you right for the New Year.
Thanks for your patience and understanding everyone.