When I saw this article cross my path, I stopped and read it even though it was written by a woman and aimed at women. The summary of the article is an author/blogger (Jenny Perry, pictured above) lost 60 pounds, going from typical fat American mom to hottie (or at least hottie for her age, for you more picky types).
I have talked before about how it seems like just about all women I know tend to get fatter and fatter regardless of their age, race, body type, or personality type. Often this doesn’t bother me too much, since an extra 10-15 pounds on a hot, super trim woman actually makes a lot of women look better, at least in my view, since it makes the body parts we men like big a little bigger. When they start gaining a lot of weight, and start looking fat, then yeah, my attraction does drop significantly, as one would expect of a man with human male biology.
This article provides a little insight into why American women not only gain weight, but stay fat once they do.
She mentioned how once she lost the weight and started looking hot, she was uncomfortable about how some men started to look at her. However, often she liked it, especially when younger men ogled her at the gym, so this is one of those “I don’t like it unless I like it” irrational woman-things. In other words, she liked it when young hot guys stared at her, but when ugly guys at the convenience store started at her, she felt it was “creepy.”
How I weep for her.
She also ends the article with a bunch of woman language about who all women should embrace their inner beauty, how men shouldn’t objectivity women, and all the usual defensive over-33 female stuff you’ve heard a thousand times.
Anyway, these parts of the article are not relevant to my point, but I want to make sure I’m quoting her in context.
Here’s what is relevant to my point. She says when she lost the weight:
It was great and I felt pretty… except for a few ugly things. First of all, one of the moms joked that if I lost any more weight, no one would want to hang out with me.
Sad thing was, it wasn’t a joke. She goes on:
I already felt that. There was a judgment thing going on and of course jealousy could have been behind it. Also, people don’t like when we change. It bugs them out. It makes them confront certain parts of themselves they think they can’t change.
Conversations with all of her other fat mom friends became awkward:
Many times when a woman would see I lost weight, she would tell me how they should lose weight or give me excuses why they haven’t. I never knew what to say. I’d offer tips, but the conversation never really seemed to be about weight in the end.
And there you go. This is one of the biggest reasons why American women A) get fat and B) stay fat. They look around and see all of their girlfriends also getting fat, especially as they get married.
Women see all their overweight, over-33, married female friends, with the stressed-out attitudes and the short butch haircuts, so naturally, they slowly become one of these women. If they try to lose weight, they get a bunch of social pressure from their female peer group about how bad that is. Since most men are betas, their husbands don’t leave them when they get fat, because of neediness, oneitis, and anti-man divorce and custody laws. The husbands will cheat on these women of course, and do so in great numbers, since long-term monogamy doesn’t work, but they won’t leave. As I’ve discussed many times before, statistically it is women who end marriages, not men.
Whenever anyone points out that they might be happier and healthier if they weren’t fat, they go into a tirade about “inner beauty” or “you’re more than your body” or something. What does increased risk of heart attack, diabetes, and cancer have to do with inner beauty? Nothing of course, but screaming about inner beauty sounds good. In an era ruled by emotionalism, people buy that shit. And so we all get fatter, women especially.
None of this is a knock on Ms. Perry, despite some disagreements I have with her. I applaud her. Despite all the pressure from her female peer group to stay the standard, fat, short-haired American mom, she busted through all of that Societal Programming and lost the weight, and now she looks very hot. Congratulations; my hat is off to her. She’s done what most chubby women should do. It’s also what most chubby men should do (I’ve lost my fair share of weight, though I’m not done).
The reality is that while America publicly tries to convince women to be skinny, there is equal or greater private Societal Programming that tells women they should be fat, and stay fat. Things like:
- “If he’s a good man, he’ll love you for you, no matter how you look.”
- “Never let anyone define you by your appearance.”
- “You’re beautiful on the inside.”
- “I’m not going to be your friend any more if you lose more weight.”
- “I hate all those skinny bitches! Look at that bitch!”
Any of that sound familiar? Of course it does. Societal Programming at its finest, but this time it’s women against women. Us men are on the sidelines, sadly shaking our heads at why women, even young women, gain so much weight.
This is because generally speaking, American women want to be fat. Not all of them, but most of them, especially if you’re talking about married women.
Again I will state for the record that this is not an age thing. The vast, vast majority of women I know in their teens and twenties get noticeably fatter every five-year period, so anyone throwing out the usual excuse of “it’s hard for a woman to stay skinny as they get older” or “it’s hard for a woman to stay skinny after they have kids” is dead wrong and is just making excuses. How do you explain all these overweight twenty-somethings then? Go visit South America some time and look at those women. You’ll be quite shocked to see all these super hot SKINNY women in their 40s and 50s. How do you explain them? Age has very, very little to do with this.
It’s not about age. It’s about Societal Programming.
I don’t like it any more than you do. Despite some of her opinions, we need more women like Ms. Perry. We need more women to show women that being fit and attractive is a good thing for a woman, not a bad thing. Again, women need to show them this, because if guys try to do it, we’ll be labeled shallow assholes or misogynists, as I’m sure I’ll be labeled by women reading this article, even though all I’m doing is stating facts.
Oh well. Time to get back to those women who haven’t gained weight yet.